Why are hugs important?

Hugs are part of a more complex subject, “Love Language.”

Recognizing and understanding love languages can significantly improve relationships. It helps partners communicate their needs more effectively and fosters a deeper emotional connection. When both partners understand each other’s love languages, they can express love in ways that resonate most with one another, leading to greater satisfaction and harmony in the relationship.

Love language doesn’t stop in your home. In our increasingly social world, we tell people we barely know happy birthday. How does social media affect the fabric of the human condition?

I want to discuss five different aspects of the love language. I want to focus on the fifth one specifically.

• Words of Affirmation: This language involves expressing love through verbal compliments, encouragement, and affirming words. People who resonate with this love language feel valued when they hear kind words.
• Acts of Service: For some, actions speak louder than words. This love language emphasizes doing things for your partner, such as helping with chores or running errands, to show care and support.
• Receiving Gifts: This language is about giving thoughtful gifts that show you are thinking of someone. It’s not about the monetary value but the sentiment behind the gift that matters.
• Quality Time: This love language focuses on giving your partner undivided attention. Spending meaningful time together without distractions is crucial for those who value this form of love.

I want to expand on this form of expressing love. Without going into a lengthy explanation, let’s talk about what it means to be “without distractions.” Kindly disable the phone and store away any other electronic devices. When I say quality time, I truly mean it. You are important to me, and I truly want to hear about what’s happening in your life. How many times have you interrupted or been interrupted by something on some electronic leash? Have you done it to people? Are you guilty of putting them in some lower class of person by elevating a Facebook post or reel? It’s important to put them first, period.

• Physical Touch: For many, physical affection such as hugs, kisses, and holding hands is essential. This love language emphasizes the importance of physical closeness in expressing love.

The first four are self-explanatory, and we can accomplish many of them through social media. We can also do the opposite through an unkind word. I have told many people never to drink and drive and never to drink and get on social media. While you might not kill someone on social media, your words can cut like knives (yeah, I know it was in a song), and the damage your thoughtlessness can do is far-reaching.

What about physical touch?”

Not that many years ago, I topped a hill at freeway speeds to meet head-on with a drunk guy in a Cadillac that his wife had just bought him because he promised to stop drinking after he drove his truck into a tree. True story…you can read about it here…

Beeping monitors, wires, and tubes mixed with needles, and the sterile odor of a hospital is only part of the process. The thought of never being held or holding someone again sets the stage for an emotional roller coaster.

To live through an experience like that makes one appreciate life and its simple pleasures.

Why physical touch, why hugs?

The truth is you have no idea what someone else is going through. People don’t fake depression, they fake happiness. When you ask someone how they are doing and they say “fine,” do you buy it? We are all going through stuff. We also know that when someone asks us how we are doing they rarely want to know the truth.

 “Fine great. Did you see the Cowboys?”

“What if we asked, “No, really…how are you doing, and then listened?”

A simple hug can do that. I care about you and I don’t know what you are going through but this hug is my way of showing…not telling you…that I care about you. If you need an ear or a shoulder, I am here.” Would the world be so much better if we showed more people that we care about them?

Are we that kind of friend? So, why hug?

Hugs play a significant role in our emotional and physical well-being. Here are some key reasons why hugs are important:

1. Emotional Connection

Hugging fosters a sense of connection and belonging. It communicates feelings of safety, love, and support, which can be especially comforting during difficult times. This emotional bond is crucial for mental health, as it helps reduce feelings of loneliness and isolation.

2. Physical Health Benefits

Research indicates that hugging can have tangible health benefits. For instance, it promotes the production of oxytocin, often referred to as the “love hormone,” which acts as a stress buffer and can enhance overall well-being. Additionally, frequent hugging has been linked to reduced severity of infections, highlighting its role in bolstering the immune system.

3. Stress Reduction

Hugs can significantly lower stress levels. The act of hugging can help ease feelings of anxiety and depression by boosting the release of feel-good hormones, which can improve mood and emotional resilience.

4. Pain Relief

Interestingly, hugging may also help reduce physical pain. Touch, including hugging, is a powerful form of communication that can convey comfort and support, potentially leading to a decrease in pain perception. Were you aware that your state of mind has an effect on your general health?

True story time:

We had a blood drive at work. One of my employees got a call from them telling her to check with her doctor, something wasn’t right with her blood. This girl had never missed work and was always up. She was delightful in every way. Two weeks after she got the news that she had cancer, she died. Her brain shut her down.

What if she had positive support from just a few hugs? There are cancer centers that focus on treating the whole body, not just the disease. I believe in something I call PMA or a positive mental attitude. There is scientific evidence that your mind is powerful. How could we develop more PMA in people we know? It’s like the butterfly effect, ripples in a pond. The media for whatever reason wants us at each other throats, scared of everything. Would hugs be the middle finger to the talking heads stoking fear and hatred? I think it would be worth a try. Whatever happened to Flower Power?

Did you know there are different types of hugs?

Hugs come in various forms, each conveying different emotions and meanings. Here are some common types of hugs and what they typically signify:

• Bear Hug A bear hug is a strong, enveloping embrace that conveys warmth and affection. It often signifies a deep emotional connection and is typically shared between close friends or loved ones.
• Side Hug In a side hug, two people stand next to each other and wrap one arm around the other. This type of hug is often seen as more casual and can indicate friendship or comfort without being overly intimate.
• Romantic Hug This hug is characterized by a close embrace, often with bodies pressed together. It signifies romantic feelings and intimacy, typically shared between partners.
• Back Hug A back hug occurs when one person hugs another from behind. This type of hug can express protection, affection, and surprise, often making the person being hugged feel cherished and secure.
• Polite Hug A polite hug is usually brief and may occur in social situations where a more formal greeting is appropriate. It often lacks the emotional depth of other hugs and is more about social etiquette.
• Comforting Hug This hug is given to provide support and reassurance during tough times. It is often longer and more enveloping, conveying empathy and understanding.
• Group Hug A group hug involves multiple people coming together for a collective embrace. It signifies unity, friendship, and shared joy, often seen in celebrations or moments of camaraderie.
• Lift Hug In a lift hug, one person lifts the other off the ground while hugging. This playful gesture often signifies excitement and joy, commonly seen in romantic relationships or among close friends.

I am all for meaningful hugs. The gift of a hug, a genuine hug, is worth more than just about anything you can think of. When we draw our last breath, everything that we own stays behind—all the money, cars, collections, clothes, friends, all of it.

What do you take with you?

I pray we take the memories of the kindnesses we were shown.

The Mormons believe they group around their family members. That is one reason they are so adept at genealogy. I guess they want to know who is waiting for them.

The love language of kindness, touch, empathy, and caring for another person is a selfless act and a treasure that one takes with them, I hope.

Always resolve conflicts before going to sleep and make a point to express appreciation to your loved ones. Nothing compares to the impact of a warm embrace over verbal communication.

What if we incorporate the phrase in our daily walk, “I may not agree with you, but I love you anyway?”

Words to think about.

-Best