Can we sit a spell and talk?
This post is quite different from my previous post about my latest novels.
I’ve been thinking a lot about family, friends, and the folks whom I care about, some of whom live a few doors down. For the last nine months, it seems like people are mad at things none of us can control, and that anger spills onto the people right beside them—at home, at school, and especially online.
I miss the days of front-porch talks after church, your great‑grandmother’s fried chicken and lemonade, and the squeals of kids on the swings and that dizzy old merry‑go‑round. I miss running through the sprinkler as a child and chasing fireflies with a mason jar after dark—when just holding someone’s hand could make your heart flutter. You might not be there yet with those feelings—and that’s okay. One day you’ll understand. For now, just know there was a sweetness to those simple moments.
I blame social media and information overload for much of this. There are those who wish to control the narrative by spreading evil, yes, evil, through ignorance, both spewed by them and by those who are unwilling to see the hate for what it is, propaganda.
These days, it feels like there’s a different kind of bug going around—not a sickness of the body, but of the heart. I see rooms full of people, all together, and yet most eyes are glued to a screen. The trouble isn’t just social media itself; it’s that anyone, no matter their maturity, can throw words into the wind. Some of those words can poison minds and hearts. There are folks who know how to push your buttons—fear, anger, outrage—because those spread fastest. Love doesn’t trend as easily, have you noticed?
It’s Sunday for me—a day to pause and remember what can get lost without a little refresher. I saw some posts today that weren’t thought through, and it nudged me to share this: in a world of fences, passwords, and polarized feeds, being a good neighbor is a quiet revolution. Jesus put it simply: love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:39). He also taught us to pray, “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us” (Matthew 6:12). That gets real when your “neighbor” has hurt your feelings or crossed a line.
Why be neighborly—even to someone who offends you
It shows God’s heart: He is kind even to the ungrateful (Luke 6:35–36).
It breaks the get‑even cycle: overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21).
It frees your heart from bitterness (Ephesians 4:31–32).
It points people to the good news: like the Good Samaritan did (Luke 10:25–37).
It helps whole communities heal (Matthew 5:9).
What neighborly love is not
Not excusing harm. Wrong is still wrong (Isaiah 5:20).
Not boundary‑free. Guard your heart; rebuild trust slowly (Proverbs 4:23).
Not enabling. Restore gently, don’t permit harm (Galatians 6:1).
Not against justice. Accountability can be loving (Micah 6:8; Romans 13:1–4).
Not always reconciliation. Forgiveness takes one; reconciliation takes two (Romans 12:18).
A simple path for everyday misunderstandings
Start with your heart: pray for a clean heart and for the other person by name (Psalm 51:10; Matthew 5:44). Ask, “What’s my part?” (Matthew 7:3–5).
Choose a gentle tone: a soft answer turns away anger (Proverbs 15:1; James 1:19).
Talk privately and plainly. Example: “I want to be good neighbors. When the music’s loud after 10 p.m., I can’t sleep. Could we set quiet hours?”
Offer forgiveness: name the hurt and release the debt to God (Colossians 3:13). You may need to forgive more than once as feelings pop back up.
Seek solutions, not victory: small, practical compromises help everyone.
Ask for help if needed: bring one or two trusted people to mediate (Matthew 18:15–16).
Keep doing small kindnesses: a wave, a shared tomato, a hand with a bin (1 Peter 3:9).
Habits that grow a neighborly life
Pray for your street by name as you walk (Jeremiah 29:7).
Create regular touchpoints: porch time, a seasonal potluck, or a simple group chat for practical updates.
Be first to apologize: “I was short yesterday. I’m sorry.”
Serve together: pick up litter, organize a meal train, check on elders.
Keep short accounts: handle small irritations kindly and early (Ephesians 4:26–27).
Words you can borrow
To start: “I want a good relationship as neighbors. Could we talk about something on my mind?”
To share impact: “When X happens, Y is the impact for me. Can we find a solution that works for both of us?”
To forgive: “I was hurt by what happened. I choose to forgive you. Let’s move forward with clearer boundaries.”
To set a boundary: “I care about being good neighbors. I need X to feel safe. If X can’t happen, I’ll need to do Y.”
Scripture anchors
Love your neighbor: Matthew 22:37–39
Forgive as forgiven: Matthew 6:12; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:13
Peacemaking and enemy‑love: Matthew 5:9, 38–44; Romans 12:17–21; 1 Peter 3:9
Gentle correction: Galatians 6:1; Matthew 18:15–17
Compassion in action: Luke 10:25–37
Do justice, love mercy, walk humbly: Micah 6:8
A short prayer Lord, make me a neighbor after Your heart. Give me courage to seek peace, grace to forgive, wisdom to set good boundaries, and love that overcomes evil with good. Make our street a place of safety, kindness, and hope. Amen.
A simple next step this week
Do one neighborly act: a hello at the mailbox, a thank‑you note, a bag of garden produce, or a text to set up a friendly chat.
Name one hurt you’re holding before God and choose to forgive. If it’s wise and safe, begin a gentle conversation.
Loving neighbors who trespass isn’t naïve—it’s following Jesus. It’s steady, courageous love that tells the truth, keeps boundaries, seeks justice, and keeps working for peace. And when your day comes to chase fireflies with someone who makes your heart flutter, I hope you’ll bring that same kind of love to your friendships and your neighborhood. I’m cheering you on.
