Tag: books

Effective Book Marketing Strategies for Authors

As the Director of the Carrollton League of Writers, I talk a lot about marketing. Like, a lot. Why? Because, as a writer, you’re basically doing one of three things at any given moment: writing, editing, or trying to convince people to buy the damn thing you wrote. And let me tell you right now: that third one is where dreams go to die.

That’s why I tell people to keep their day jobs. Seriously. Writing is a business, sure, but half the time, it’s just a fancy way to justify a tax write-off. “No, honey, it’s not a failed hobby—it’s a business expense.” And let’s just say most writers aren’t exactly raking in Stephen King-level royalty checks.

But hey, I’m not here to crush your dreams of being the next EL James (although I could). Instead, let me help you out with some marketing tips. Because let’s face it: if you don’t sell your book, nobody’s gonna read it. Well, except for your mom—and even she might “accidentally” forget to finish it.

1. Develop a Book Marketing Strategy

This is step one, folks. Before you do anything else, you need a plan. I know, planning isn’t sexy or fun, but neither is explaining to your friends why your book has been on Amazon for two years and still has zero reviews.

Here’s the deal: set some goals, figure out who the hell you’re writing for (hint: it’s not “everyone”), and decide how you’re going to reach them. A clear marketing strategy will help you avoid wasting time on pointless crap that doesn’t work.

2. Build Your Author Platform

Look, if nobody knows who you are, nobody’s gonna care about your book. That’s where your author platform comes in. It’s basically your online stage—so make sure you don’t look like a total amateur while you’re standing on it.

Create an Author Website: Think of this as your digital home base. It’s where people will go to learn about you, your book, and why they should give you their money. Plus, it’s a great place to collect email addresses for future marketing. (Yes, we’re going to talk about email lists later, so don’t roll your eyes yet.)

Engage on Social Media: This is where you can pretend you’re a celebrity, even if you’re just a writer with 12 followers and a lot of opinions about coffee. Platforms like Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok are your friends—if you use them right. Post updates, share behind-the-scenes tidbits, and actually interact with people. Nobody likes a self-promotional robot.

3. Prepare for Launch

Your book launch is a big freaking deal. It’s like a party, except instead of booze and karaoke, you’re hoping people will buy your book and leave nice reviews. So, yeah, slightly less fun, but still important.

Write a Killer Author Bio: This is your chance to convince readers that you’re an actual human being and not some faceless entity who churned out a book because ChatGPT told you to. Be relatable. Be funny. (Or don’t be funny, if that’s not your thing—but at least try to be interesting.)

Build a Launch Team: Gather a group of people who are willing to hype you up. These could be friends, family, or random strangers you bribed with the promise of free copies. They’ll leave early reviews, share your book on social media, and generally make you look like you’ve got a whole squad cheering for you.

Find Reviewers: Bloggers, influencers, that one book nerd you know—they’re all fair game. Reviews matter. A lot. Especially on platforms like Amazon. Without them, your book might as well not exist.

4. Optimize Your Book’s Online Presence

Your book’s online presence is like its dating profile. If it’s boring, confusing, or full of typos, nobody’s swiping right.

Metadata and Keywords: This is the boring part, but it’s super important. Make sure your book’s title, description, and keywords are optimized for search engines. Basically, make it easy for people to find your book when they’re browsing online.

Decide Where to Sell: Amazon is the obvious choice, but you’ve got options. You could go exclusive with Kindle Direct Publishing (and maybe Kindle Unlimited) or distribute your book more widely. Just know that Amazon is kind of like the popular kid at school—if you’re not hanging out there, you’re probably missing out on a lot of attention.

5. Promote Your Book

Here’s where the real hustle comes in. You’ve got to put yourself out there and make people want to read your book.

Leverage Social Proof: Translation: beg readers to leave reviews. The more people are talking about your book online, the more likely it is that others will check it out.

Reach Out for Publicity: Bloggers, podcasters, and media outlets can help spread the word. Guest blogging and podcast interviews are great ways to get in front of new audiences. Plus, you get to feel important for a hot second.

Run Promotions: Discounts, giveaways, limited-time offers—these are all great ways to generate buzz. Everyone loves free stuff, so use that to your advantage.

6. Keep the Momentum Going

Here’s the thing about book marketing: it doesn’t stop after your launch. If you want your book to keep selling, you’ve got to keep working at it. (Yeah, I know. It sucks. Welcome to the grind.)

Build an Email List: Remember when I said we’d talk about email lists? Well, here we are. Use your website and social media to collect email addresses, then send out regular newsletters to keep your audience engaged. Think of it as your personal fan club.

Keep Marketing: Try new things. Experiment. Fail. Learn. And then try again. Marketing is an ongoing process, and the more you do it, the better you’ll get.

Start thinking about marketing before you finish your book. I know, it’s tempting to just focus on the writing and hope people will magically find your work later, but that’s not how it works. The earlier you start planning and building your platform, the better your chances of success.

And hey, if all else fails, at least you can say you gave it a shot. Worst case scenario, you’ve got a great story to tell at parties: “Remember that time I tried to be a famous author? Yeah, that was wild.”

If you want me to dig deeper into any of these steps—or if you just need someone to commiserate with—I’m here for you. Let’s make your book the next big thing (or at least a thing).

#HowToBeAnAuthor
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How to Craft a Compelling Author Bio for Your Book

After spending months or even years pouring your heart into writing a book, it’s natural to ask yourself: What else goes into this book to make it complete? Beyond captivating stories or compelling content, one of the key elements that often gets overlooked is the author bio.

The back-of-book biography is your chance to make a memorable first impression on readers. Keep it short, relevant, and engaging. Focus on what makes you the right person to have written this book, and sprinkle in a touch of personality to make it relatable.

Whether you’re a seasoned author or publishing your first book, your bio is an opportunity to connect with your audience, so make it count!

As our writers group, The Carrollton League of Writers, is working on compiling a book of short stories,

I’ve been thinking a lot about author bios. With multiple contributors, we’ve decided to dedicate a “Meet the Authors” section in our book, offering each writer a chance to connect with readers. Even with more space available in this section, understanding the art of crafting a concise, back-of-book author bio is essential.

So, what exactly goes into an author bio for the back of a book? Let’s break it down.

What Is a Back-of-Book Biography?

A back-of-book biography—often called an author bio—is a brief, engaging snapshot of who you are as a writer. It’s designed to introduce you to readers, build a connection, and establish your credibility. This small piece of text can have a big impact on how readers perceive you and your work.

Key Elements of a Back-of-Book Biography

Here’s what to include for a polished, professional author bio:

1. Brevity

Keep it short and sweet. A back-cover bio is typically no more than a sentence or two. There’s no room for your full life story here—focus only on the essentials.

2. Relevant Credentials

Highlight any qualifications, experiences, or achievements that relate to your book. For example:

Are you a former detective writing a crime thriller? Mention it.

Writing about personal finance? Note your professional background in the field.

3. Personal Touch

Include a relatable or humanizing detail, like where you live, a hobby, or a quirky fact. This helps readers connect with you on a personal level.

4. Tone

Match the tone of your bio to the tone of your book.

A humorous book might call for a witty, playful bio.

A serious nonfiction work should strike a professional, polished tone.

5. Current Work or Achievements

If you’ve published other notable works or received awards, this is the place to highlight them. Mention only the most impressive or relevant ones to keep it concise.

6. Call to Action (Optional)

You can include a website, social media handle, or email for readers who want to connect or learn more about you. This is optional but can be a great way to engage your audience beyond the book.

What to Avoid in Your Author Bio

1. Too Much Detail

Save the lengthy biography for the inside of the book or a dedicated “About the Author” page. The back-of-book bio should be quick and to the point.

2. Overshadowing the Book

The bio is there to complement the book, not steal the spotlight. Don’t let it distract from the main event: your writing.

Example of a Back Cover Author Bio

To give you an idea, here’s a simple yet effective example:

Jane Smith is a former marine biologist whose adventures at sea inspired her debut novel. She lives in Seattle with her two cats and a love of coffee.

This bio is concise, includes relevant credentials, adds a personal touch, and matches the tone of the book (which might be a fun, adventure-filled tale).

But what about the Author page? you might ask…

Here’s an example of what a more detailed “About the Author” page might look like, followed by an explanation of how it differs from a back-of-book bio:
About the Author
Jane Smith is a former marine biologist turned novelist who draws inspiration from her years of exploring the oceans. During her career, she spent over a decade researching coral reef ecosystems and leading deep-sea dives, experiences that serve as the foundation for her debut novel, Beneath the Waves.
Jane holds a Master’s degree in Marine Biology from the University of Washington and has published several academic papers on marine conservation. After transitioning from science to storytelling, Jane discovered her passion for weaving gripping adventures with environmental themes, which she hopes will inspire readers to appreciate and protect the natural world.
When she’s not writing, Jane enjoys kayaking along the Pacific Northwest coastline, photographing wildlife, and experimenting with sustainable gardening. She currently lives in Seattle with her two cats, Luna and Neptune, and an ever-growing collection of sea glass.
You can learn more about Jane and her work by visiting her website at http://www.janesmithwrites.com or following her on Instagram at @janesmithwrites.
How a Dedicated About Page Differs from a Back-of-Book Bio
The “About the Author” page is much longer and more detailed compared to a back-of-book bio, and here’s how they differ:

Length and Detail
Back-of-Book Bio: Short and concise—usually just 1-3 sentences meant to give readers a quick introduction to the author.
Example: Jane Smith is a former marine biologist whose adventures at sea inspired her debut novel. She lives in Seattle with her two cats.
About Page: Longer and more comprehensive, allowing the author to go into greater detail about their background, education, career, and personal life.
Purpose
Back-of-Book Bio: Its primary purpose is to establish credibility and give a brief personal touch, helping readers understand why the author is qualified to write the book.
About Page: Designed to provide a fuller picture of the author, including their expertise, motivations, hobbies, and potentially their journey as a writer, creating a deeper connection with the audience.
Tone
Back-of-Book Bio: Matches the tone of the book and is usually professional yet approachable (e.g., witty for a humorous book, formal for serious nonfiction).
About Page: Can be more conversational and personal, giving readers insight into the author’s personality and life beyond the book.
Call to Action
Back-of-Book Bio: Sometimes includes a subtle call to action, like a website or social media handle, but this isn’t always included.
About Page: Almost always includes links to the author’s website, social media, or other works, encouraging readers to engage further.
Audience
Back-of-Book Bio: Targets readers who are deciding whether to purchase or read the book.
About Page: Targets readers who want to learn more about the author after enjoying their book or discovering their work online.
When to Use Each
Back-of-Book Bio: A must-have for any book, as it’s often the first impression readers get of the author.
About Page: Ideal for an author’s website, blog, or even the back matter of a book for readers who want to dive deeper into the author’s life and work.

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“How to Create Characters That Don’t Suck (and Maybe Even Kick Ass)”

How to Build Characters : A Guide for Writers

So, while slogging through some stories (bless their hearts), it hit me that some folks could really use a crash course in character development. Because, let’s face it, reading about flat, lifeless characters is about as fun as watching paint dry on a rainy day. Great stories are built on great characters, so let’s talk about how to make them memorable, relatable, and, you know, not garbage.

Here’s the rundown:

1. Give Them a Damn Good Reason to Exist (aka Motivation)

Every character worth their salt wants something—something big, something juicy. It doesn’t matter if it’s love, revenge, a fat stack of cash, or just not dying a horrible death. Ask yourself: What’s their deal? What are they willing to burn down (figuratively, or literally) to get it? Take Harry Potter, for instance; he’s on a mission to take down Voldemort because, well, Voldemort killed his parents, and that’s kind of a dick move. See? Motivation. Clear as day.

2. Nobody Likes a Perfect

Perfect people don’t exist. (Except maybe Beyoncé, but even she probably has something.) If your character’s flawless, they’re boring. Like, “I ‘m-skipping-to-the-next-book” boring. Give them a mix of good and bad traits. Maybe your hero is brave as hell, but can’t keep their mouth shut when they should. Or maybe your villain is a manipulative jerk but secretly cries when they see stray puppies. People are messy; make your characters messy, too.

3. Growth Is Cool, but Stubbornness Is Also Fun

Look, people change or they don’t. Either way, it’s entertaining. Great stories often show characters evolving because of all the crap they go through. But hey, if your character is the kind of person who doubles down on their bad decisions instead of learning from them, that’s cool too. We all know someone like that in real life. (And we probably talk about them behind their back.)

4. Choices, Choices, Choices

Want your characters to feel real? Make them do stuff. Let them screw up, make bold moves, or accidentally burn down a metaphorical (or literal) bridge. Their decisions should have consequences, good ones, bad ones, or “holy-shit-did-they-really do that” ones. Actions reveal who your characters truly are. Plus, it keeps your plot from dying a slow, uneventful death.

5. Backstory: Sprinkle, Don’t Dump

A character’s past is like salt in a recipe, use just enough to enhance the flavor, but don’t go dumping the whole shaker in. Nobody wants to sit through five pages about your character’s traumatic childhood unless it actually affects how they act right now. Give us little breadcrumbs. Let us connect the dots. You’re not writing a therapy session, you’re writing a story.

6. Make Them Sound Like Actual Humans

Here’s a hot tip: not everyone talks like you. Shocking, I know. Give each character their own voice and quirks. Maybe one swears like a sailor, another spouts motivational quotes like they’re auditioning for a TED Talk, and another mumbles so much you’re not even sure what they’re saying half the time. Different speech patterns, body language, and habits make your characters stand out, and keep them from blending into one big, boring blob.

7. Make the Stakes Hit Home

If your character doesn’t care about what’s happening, why the hell should the reader? The stakes need to matter on a personal level. Sure, saving the world is great and all, but what if your protagonist is only doing it because their kid’s life is on the line? Or because their ex is leading the apocalypse and they want to prove they’re better at literally everything? Make it personal. Make it hurt.

8. Let Them Do Weird Shit Every Now and Then

Some of the best moments in stories come when a character does something you didn’t expect—but it still makes sense for who they are. Maybe your buttoned-up accountant suddenly punches someone in the face because they’ve finally had enough. Or your villain has a weirdly tender moment with their pet tarantula. Let your characters surprise you. Let them be unpredictable, but not completely out of character. There’s a fine line between “unexpected” and “WTF just happened.”

Final Words of Wisdom

At the end of the day, characters are the heart of your story. If you know them inside and out, their dreams, fears, secrets, and what kind of pizza they’d order at 3 a.m.—they’ll practically write the story for you. (Okay, not really, but you get the idea.) Keep them real, messy, and interesting, and your readers will stick around for the ride.

Now go forth and create some badass characters. Or don’t. But if you don’t, don’t blame me when your readers start yawning three chapters in.

In case you’re wondering… The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit is still coming. I have to focus on editing, and I hate editing.

I did publish a memoir called “Lessons I learned at the wrong side of a badge. Yes, I had guns pointed at me and every mean, ugly, nasty thing you could imagine. After you read it, come back here, or there where you purchase it and tell me your thoughts.

BTW, it’s cheap and almost free if you’re on KDP.

#CharacterDevelopment #CreativeWritingTips #WritingCharacters #StorytellingTips #HowToWriteCharacters #FictionWriting #WritingAdvice #CreateRelatableCharacters #WritingHelp #BuildBetterCharacters

Point Blank: Lessons I Learned on the Wrong Side of a Badge

A Book You Didn’t Know You Needed (But Oh, You Do)

Let me hit you with a question: Have you ever looked back on your life, shaking your head like, What the actual hell was I thinking? Ever had cops point guns at you like you just robbed a damn bank? Or been pulled over for speeding, on a bicycle? If you answered yes to any of that, welcome to the club. And if you didn’t, buckle up, because this book will give you a front-row seat to the kind of weirdness you didn’t know you needed in your life.

Now, take that “what the hell” feeling, crank it up to eleven, sprinkle in a heaping dose of stupidity, and slather it all with dark humor. That’s my life in a nutshell. Well, that, and now it’s also my book.

Point Blank isn’t just a catchy title, it’s basically the theme of my existence. It’s a front-row seat to the absurdity of growing up chasing lizards in Carrollton, Texas, and somehow ending up walking a tightrope between comedy and total catastrophe. And let’s be real—who hasn’t been there?

This book is my love letter to the moments that make life… well, incredibly dumb. It’s a collection of stories, life lessons, and the facepalm-worthy memories that prove one thing: no matter how much you think you’ve got life figured out, you don’t. (Spoiler alert: no one does.) But honestly, isn’t that where the fun is? In the ridiculous, the unexpected, and the holy-crap-why-is-this-happening moments?

So, What the Hell Is Point Blank About?

At its core, Point Blank is a comedic deep dive into life’s dumbest moments. But it’s not just that. It’s part memoir, part roast, part free therapy session (for me, not you). It’s the kind of book you pick up when life’s been kicking you in the teeth, and you need a reminder that you are not the only one out here navigating the chaos.

Here’s a little teaser of what you’re in for:

Lessons I Learned While Staring Down the Barrel of a Gun

Pro tip: Don’t try to argue your case with the cops on the side of the road. Just don’t.

How to Survive a Head-On Collision (And the Bureaucratic Circus That Follows)

Because apparently, getting hit by a drunk driver isn’t enough. Nope, fate has to throw in paperwork, insurance nightmares, and a side of complete nonsense.

The Great Paper Route Fiasco

Picture this: ink-stained hands, 5 a.m. bike rides, and a not-so-charming run-in with the local cops. (Spoiler: they weren’t impressed.)

“Arrest-Me Red” and Other Car Choices I’d Like to Forget

Fast cars, flashing lights, and one particularly chaotic road trip from Miami to Key West that felt more like a cop magnet convention.

Reinvention 101

From engineer to IT guy to sci-fi writer, because apparently, I like to keep my life as unpredictable as possible.

Why You’re Gonna Love This Book

Okay, I get it. You’re probably thinking: Do I really need another book about someone else’s ridiculous life? But hear me out, this one’s different. It’s not just about my life. It’s about our lives.

It’s about the universal stupidity we all encounter—the shared facepalm moments that remind us we’re all just winging it. You’ll laugh (hard). You’ll cringe (probably harder). You might even tear up a little, but only in that holy crap, this is too real kind of way.

Think of Point Blank as sitting down with that one friend who’s been through some serious shit, lived to tell the tale, and somehow managed to find the punchline in every disaster.

Who’s This Book For?

If you’ve ever made a decision so dumb it deserves its own monument, this book’s for you.

If you’ve ever looked at someone else’s life and thought, Well, at least I’m not that guy, this book’s definitely for you.

If you’re a fan of George Carlin’s brutal honesty, Douglas Adams’ absurd humor, or David Sedaris’ ability to find hilarity in misery, congrats—you’ve found your new favorite read.

If you just need a good laugh, a break, or a reminder that life’s most chaotic moments are often the most memorable, this book is 1000% for you.

Where to Read It

Picture this: You’re sitting on the toilet (don’t even pretend you don’t scroll or read in there), flipping pages or swiping through your phone, and suddenly you’re laughing so hard you almost fall off the damn seat. That’s what this book is for.

It’s for the bathroom, the waiting room, the coffee break, the long-ass flight, or those sleepless nights when you just want to escape the madness for a bit.

A Final Word

Point Blank isn’t just a book. It’s an experience. It’s a rollercoaster through the highs and lows, the WTF moments, and the laughs that make life worth living—and retelling.

So here’s the deal: Buy the book. Read the book. Laugh at the book. Share the book. And who knows? Maybe you’ll start seeing your own life in a slightly less serious, slightly more ridiculous light.

Because let’s face it, isn’t that what we’re all trying to do? Find the humor in the madness, make sense of the chaos, and keep moving forward, one hilariously stupid moment at a time.

Go grab your copy of Point Blank. Trust me, your life will be better (or at least funnier) for it.

Then do me a solid, give it a review from where you bought it, or even read it for free on KDP.

Mastering Hooks: Capture Readers in 3 Seconds

Struggling with the business side of writing? You’re not alone. Here’s a candid look at turning pages into paychecks—join the conversation.

Capturing and Maintaining Reader Attention in the Age of Overload

In a world where your readers’ phones buzz every few seconds, attention is the rarest resource. Great ideas aren’t enough. To connect, you need to cut through noise, spark curiosity fast, and keep delivering value line by line. This post breaks down why attention is harder to earn today—and practical ways to win and keep it.

Information Overload: The New Reality

Did I just interrupt your doomscrolling? Good—that’s part of the problem I’m writing against. I’m wading through the same flood you are: more to read, watch, and hear than any one person can hold. New posts, newsletters, videos, and podcasts never stop. Even careful, polished work gets buried under the pile.

Why Your Hook Only Gets 3 Seconds (and Why You Should Panic a Little)

Okay, writers, let’s be real for a second: your hook has the lifespan of junk mail. You know what I’m talking about—that envelope that lands in your hands, gets a three-second glance, and then, unless it screams “Open me!”, takes a one-way trip to the trash (or, as my mom used to call it, the “circular filing cabinet”). Your readers are doing the exact same thing with your title, subtitle, and opening line. If you don’t grab them immediately, well… let’s just say your hard work is headed for the digital equivalent of the recycling bin.

Your job? Be that one letter worth opening. You know the one—the one that makes you pause, unfold it, and actually read the thing. Let’s talk about how to make your writing that irresistible.

What Makes a Winning Hook?

A good hook isn’t just about sounding clever—it’s about making readers stop their scrolling, squint at your words, and think, “Wait, this is for me!” Here’s what your hook should do:

Signal relevance fast: “This is for YOU.” Not some vague “writer” or “reader”—you.

Make a clear promise: “Here’s what you’ll get if you keep reading.”

Stir curiosity: “You don’t know this yet, but you’re about to find out.”

Be specific: Use names, numbers, or real-world examples.

Set stakes: Show them what’s in it for them—time saved, pain avoided, or success achieved.

Sound human: No fluff, no jargon, no robotic nonsense.

Writing is Junk Mail (Bear With Me…)

Your title = The envelope sender: If you don’t seem trustworthy, intriguing, or relevant, trash.

Your subtitle/preview = The teaser on the envelope: What’s inside? Spell out the benefit in one clean sentence.

Your opening line = The first sentence of the letter: Hit them with tension, a question, or a surprise.

Subheads and bold lines = The P.S. on the letter: Reinforce your promise with quick, scannable takeaways.

If any of these pieces are vague, boring, or confusing, guess what? Your reader “files” you—and not in a good way.

The 3-Second Test

Before you publish, ask yourself three questions. Score each from 1–5:

Clarity: Can a stranger tell who this is for and what they’ll get?

Curiosity: Is there an unresolved question, tension, or surprise?

Credibility: Are there specifics (names, numbers, situations) to back this up?

If any score less than a 3, it’s time to rewrite. Sorry, but you owe it to your readers—and your ego.

Hook Formulas That Actually Work

Let’s get practical. These formulas are like cheat codes for writing irresistible hooks:

Problem + Time Frame + Outcome

Example: “Spend 10 minutes today and cut your email replies in half this week.”

Surprising Stat + So What

Example: “Half your readers leave by paragraph two—here’s how to keep the rest.”

Confession + Pivot

Example: “I lost my first 1,000 subscribers—here’s what I did differently on #1,001.”

Question + Consequence

Example: “What if your opening line is costing you 80% of your readers?”

Contrarian Angle + Benefit

Example: “Stop outlining—story your scenes instead.”

Tiny Promise + Clear Benefit

Example: “One sentence that makes every paragraph pull its weight.”

Specific Who + Outcome

Example: “Freelance writers: the 7-word reply that doubles approvals.”

Before-and-After Examples (Because We’ve All Been There)

Weak: “Let’s talk about writing hooks.”

Strong: “Your first line decides if your work gets read—or trashed in three seconds.”

Weak: “Here are marketing tips.”

Strong: “A non-gross way to sell your book in 15 minutes a day.”

Weak: “My editing process.”

Strong: “How I cut 27% of fluff—and gained 40% more readers.”

Weak (Fiction): “A woman faces a challenge.”

Strong: “She was supposed to be dead by dawn—and had a meeting at nine.”

Weak (Memoir/Essay): “Work overwhelmed me.”

Strong: “I didn’t quit my job—I misplaced it under 97 unread emails.”

A Quick Workflow to Nail Your Hook

Write 10 versions of your hook. Yes, 10. Just do it.

Underline your nouns and verbs. If they’re vague, swap them for concrete ones.

Add stakes: time, money, emotion, or risk.

Pick a tension device: question, contrast, surprise, or confession.

Read it out loud. Can you grasp it in one breath?

Do the phone test: glance at your hook for three seconds. If it doesn’t grab you instantly, rewrite.

Pitfalls to Avoid

Clever but unclear: If no one understands your wordplay, it doesn’t matter.

Throat-clearing: “In today’s world…” Stop. Just start where the energy is.

Overpromising: Big claims with zero specifics = instant distrust.

Passive voice and hedges: “might,” “could possibly,” “somewhat.” Nope. Be bold and direct.

Your Hook is Your Envelope

At the end of the day, your hook is the envelope that keeps your work from being trashed. Make it unmistakably for your reader, promise a real payoff, and make that promise impossible to ignore. Because, let’s be honest, we’re all one bad hook away from the literary recycling bin—and nobody wants to end up there.

Now, go write a hook that makes me stop scrolling. I dare you.

And while your at it, like, follow, share and help a fellow author out.

Thanks!

If the interests is there I will post more articles like this to assist you in your career of turning your paperback into a paycheck.

Best

Author Scott

How Authors Can Thrive in the Digital Age

A lot of you are staring at flat sales and asking me the same thing I see in my inbox every week: are people still reading?

Short answer: yes. Longer answer: hell yes, but reading has changed outfits. People still love romance, fantasy, and thrillers, yet a lot of them are grabbing audiobooks, e-books, and snackable serials on Wattpad and Substack. Attention is a fragile little beast, so readers also go for shorter, punchier stuff, or they want summaries and adaptations like podcasts and quick recaps that fit between life, work, and whatever Netflix is feeding them tonight.

Where Are People Reading?

Online platforms: Wattpad, Kindle Direct Publishing, Substack, and even Reddit are buzzing with new voices and weirdly passionate niche communities.
Social media: Instagram’s Bookstagram, TikTok’s BookTok, and Twitter’s BookTwitter can catapult a book from “who the hell is this?” to “I saw that everywhere.”
Audiobooks and podcasts: Multitaskers unite. People listen while commuting, cleaning, working out, or pretending to stretch.

Why, you might ask. Have you listened to the news? Then you know the answer.

How Can an Unknown Writer Get Known Today?

1) Social media is a tool, not a religion

Use it if it helps. It’s great for visibility, networking, and actually talking to readers, but it shouldn’t swallow your writing time.
Yes, some authors thrive with little or no social presence. They are the exception. For most of us mortals, social helps put the work in front of eyeballs.

2) Other ways to get noticed

Self-publishing: KDP and Wattpad can get your work to readers without asking anyone’s permission.
Newsletter and email list: Gold. You own that relationship, and it beats shouting into the algorithm void.
Collaborations: Guest posts, podcast interviews, swaps with other writers. Borrow audiences like a pro.
Local events: Bookstores, libraries, and fairs still move the needle. Also, free cookies sometimes.

3) If you do social, do it smart

Go where your readers hang out. TikTok is huge for YA and romance. Twitter is strong for sci-fi and literary fiction.
Post more than “buy my book.” Share behind-the-scenes bits, the messy writing process, personal stories, and jump into reader conversations. Be a human, not a billboard.

The Business of Writing: From A to Z

Writing a great story matters. Editing matters. Neither will save you if you treat your book like a message in a bottle. Authors are not just artists. You are a business. That means strategy, systems, and marketing that moves people to talk about your work and you.This is not selling out. This is how you get read.

What “Business” Means for Authors

Product: Your book, your series, your backlist, your bonus content.
Brand: The promise you make to readers and the vibe you deliver every time.
Distribution: How your work reaches people, both digital and physical.
Marketing: How you attract attention and convert it into actual readers.
Operations: Calendars, budgets, deadlines, tools, contracts, taxes. The glamorous stuff.
Analytics: Knowing what works so you can do more of it and stop guessing.

The A to Z of Author Biz

A — Audience: Define a reader persona, not a vague blob. Who are they, what do they read, where do they hang out, why do they care.
B — Brand: One line that nails your promise. Keep your covers, copy, and tone consistent.
C — Copywriting: Your blurb and ad hooks must carry their own weight. Clarity beats clever.
D — Distribution: Go wide, or go exclusive. Pick based on genre norms and your goals.
E — Email: Build a list. Own your audience. Send value, not spam.
F — Funnel: Attract, capture, nurture, convert, delight. Simple beats messy.
G — Goals: Monthly word count, quarterly launches, revenue targets. Write them down.
H — Hook: A sharp premise plus emotional stakes. Put it everywhere.
I — IP: Protect your rights. Think audio, translation, merch, adaptations.
J — Joint ventures: Cross-promos, anthology teams, podcast swaps. Borrow trust.
K — Keywords: Metadata matters. Help stores and search engines find you.
L — Launch: ARC teams, preorders, schedule, assets, reviews on day one.
M — Marketing: Sustained, not frantic. Test small, then scale.
N — Nurture: Behind-the-scenes updates, freebies, bonus chapters, Q&A.
O — Outreach: Book clubs, libraries, indie bookstores, local media.
P — Positioning and Price: Know your shelf. Price to market, then experiment.
Q — Quality control: Edit, proof, format. Readers forgive a lot, but not sloppy.
R — Reviews: Make it easy to leave them. Never argue with a reviewer.
S — Social proof: Testimonials, awards, charts, screenshots. Use them.
T — Testing: Covers, blurbs, ad images, first pages. Let data win.
U — USP: Your unique angle. Say it plainly. Repeat it often.
V — Visibility: SEO, social, ads, partnerships, events. Stack your channels.
W — Word of mouth: The engine you build on purpose, not by accident.
X — X-factor: A signature element readers remember. A tone, trope, theme, or world.
Y — You, Inc.: Protect your time and energy. Systems beat willpower.
Z — Zero regret finish: Close loops, deliver on promises, ask for the next action.

Marketing That Gets People Talking

People share what makes them feel smart, seen, or entertained. Give them something to pass along.

Talk triggers: A bold premise, an unexpected twist, a controversial question, a jaw-drop world rule. Bake one into the book and the blurb.
Shareables: Quote cards, short audio clips, 20–40 second video hooks, tidy behind-the-scenes photos. Make it easy to repost.
Reader roles: ARC team, street team, beta readers, name-a-character contests, choice-of-cover votes.
Communities: Goodreads groups, Discord servers, Reddit threads, TikTok and Instagram niches. Show up where conversations already exist.
Micro-influencers: Bookstagrammers, BookTok creators, niche podcasts, genre newsletters. Smaller audiences can convert better.
Book clubs: Offer discussion guides, Zoom drop-ins, signed bookplates, discounts for bulk.
Local buzz: Libraries, indie bookstores, college lit groups, hometown papers. Real humans, real momentum.

Your Visibility Stack

Home base: A simple website and an email list. You own both.
One primary social channel: Go where your readers actually are. Post consistently, not constantly.
Retail pages that convert: Strong cover, tight blurb, dialed metadata, compelling Look Inside.
Ads as accelerant: Start tiny on Amazon, Meta, or TikTok. Test audiences and creatives.
Search and SEO: Author name, series name, genre keywords. Make Google your friend.

A Simple Weekly System

Write: 5 sessions. Protect them like a dragon hoard.
Nurture: 1 email or community post with value or a peek behind the curtain.
Grow: 1 outreach action. Pitch a podcast, DM a creator, apply for a promo.
Promote: 2 evergreen posts or clips that spotlight your hook.
Measure: 20 minutes on metrics. Keep doing what moves the needle.

Metrics That Matter

Email list growth and open rate
Conversion on your retail pages
Cost per click and cost per new reader
Read-through across a series
Reviews per 100 sales
Time on page for your first chapter or sample

Common Mistakes to Avoid

Hiding behind the book: You are part of the product. Readers follow people.
Launching cold: Build a list and a conversation before release week.
Random acts of marketing: Pick a plan and stick to it for at least one quarter.
Chasing every trend: Choose one lane you can sustain.
Forgetting the back end: No clear next step means lost momentum.

Make Them Talk About You

Own a theme or hill to die on: A point of view readers can quote at dinner.
Name your world or promise: A catchy series name or manifesto line helps memory stick.
Deliver delight moments: Unexpected bonus scenes, secret epilogues, surprise art drops.
Invite participation: Polls, challenges, reading sprints, live Q&A.
Close with an ask: If you loved it, tell a friend, leave a review, join the list. Simple and direct.

Now, for all this free advice…My latest creation The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit is almost ready for publication. If you like what you read, give me a follow, a thumbs up, hell repost it for me because what I have written will not only assist other writers but this book which is as large as “The Big Beautiful Bill.” is almost ready.

Thanks and much Love…

AuthorScott

Are Premium Writing Tools Worth the Investment?

Writers with a lifelong passion for the written word and the craft of storytelling often recognize the importance of using the right tools to bring their ideas to life. For those who have explored genres ranging from psychological thrillers with dark, erotic edges to humorous works like my work in progress, “The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit,” every project demands a unique approach. Expensive writing tools—designed to refine grammar, enhance prose, and assist with plot development—are becoming an integral part of the writing process. But are they worth the investment for seasoned writers? Let’s explore.
Why Consider Premium Writing Tools?
Writers who are equally fascinated by both the arts and technology often look for ways to combine these passions to improve their craft. Writing tools have evolved far beyond basic spell checkers and are now sophisticated programs capable of analyzing tone, identifying plot holes, and suggesting improvements to elevate any piece of writing.
For authors who work on a wide range of projects—whether humorous critiques, science fiction adventures, or dark psychological thrillers—these tools serve as a valuable second pair of eyes. They ensure that stories remain polished, engaging, and free of errors.
How Writing Tools Can Help (and Where They Shine)
Expensive writing tools offer several features that make them worth the investment. Here’s how they can enhance different aspects of writing:
Grammar and Clarity
Even the most experienced writers can miss grammatical errors, unclear sentences, or awkward phrasing. Tools like Grammarly Premium or ProWritingAid go beyond simple corrections by analyzing sentence structure, suggesting concise alternatives, and highlighting overused phrases. For example, in a psychological thriller, where every word must carry weight, having a tool that ensures clarity is invaluable.
Style and Tone Analysis
Capturing the right tone is crucial in writing. Tools like Hemingway Editor make sure that the writing is accessible and punchy, pointing out overly complex sentences and passive voice. AI-driven tools like Sudowrite take this further by suggesting stylistic changes to match the intended tone, whether it’s sharp wit, emotional vulnerability, or urgent tension.
Plot Development and Story Structure
Writing intricate narratives, such as science fiction or thrillers, often comes with the challenge of spotting plot holes or inconsistencies. Tools like Campfire Pro or Plottr allow writers to map out their stories, track character arcs, and identify gaps in the plot. These tools are particularly helpful when dealing with multi-layered storylines or weaving together multiple timelines.
Research Assistance
Writers with backgrounds in history, literature, or even technical fields like physics understand the importance of research in crafting believable worlds. Tools like Scrivener allow them to organize research alongside their writing, making it easy to reference important details without disrupting their workflow.
Collaborative Feedback
Writing is often a solitary craft, but feedback is essential to growth. Tools like Fictionary provide AI-driven developmental editing, helping assess pacing, tension, and character development. For writers who explore varied genres, having a tool that serves as a digital writing coach can make a significant difference.
Do Writers Really Need Expensive Tools?
For writers serious about honing their craft, premium tools can be a game-changer. These tools aren’t substitutes for creativity or hard work—they’re enhancers. The most compelling stories come from within, but even the best storytellers benefit from tools that refine their work and help their ideas shine.
For instance, while crafting a humorous book like Stupid Shit, tools can ensure comedic timing lands effectively and critiques of absurdity remain sharp. In a psychological thriller, these tools can help ensure tension builds naturally and characters’ motivations stay consistent throughout the narrative.
Balancing Technology with Creativity
Technology is only as effective as the person using it. Writing software cannot replace a writer’s unique voice, perspective, or creative spark. It’s easy to become overly reliant on AI-driven tools, but the heart of any story always comes from the writer.
These tools function more like sophisticated assistants—they highlight technical flaws, streamline the process, and organize ideas, but the artistry remains in the hands of the writer.
Are Expensive Writing Tools Worth It?
For writers passionate about storytelling and willing to embrace technology, investing in premium tools is a wise decision. These tools streamline the writing process, refine ideas, and ensure that every word on the page serves its purpose. Whether crafting an intricate psychological thriller or a humorous critique of human absurdity, writing tools help writers reach new creative heights.
The best advice for writers considering these tools? Start small, experiment, and choose the ones that align with your goals. Remember, writing tools are there to support the craft—not replace it.
Embrace the technology, refine your craft, and keep writing. At the end of the day, the world needs great stories—flaws and all.
What are your thoughts on premium writing tools? Have you used any of the ones mentioned here? Let us know in the comments!

What would you surrender for a story that won’t stop knocking?

I surrendered the glow. The soft, blue hum that filled the room after dinner. I set the remote down the way some people set aside sugar for Lent—deliberately, almost ceremonially—like I was laying a coin on a ferryman’s palm. The one-eyed monster blinked into its own reflection, and the living room exhaled. No laugh track. No canned cliffhanger. Only the fridge whispering, the clock ticking, the house going quiet enough for another world to speak.

That was the night my AR clicked on.

Not augmented reality. Author Reality. The dimension that lives behind every closed door and blinking cursor. It doesn’t need a headset, and it doesn’t apologize for being demanding. It’s the world that asks you to show up with the same seriousness you bring to your job, your family, your grief, your joy. It rewards the faithful, and it keeps its secrets from the curious who wander in for a minute and wander back out.

Is it worth it? Depends on what you want from a story: to be carried, or to build the boat.

Here’s the rhythm I’ve learned, the three-beat cadence of making a book: if I’m not writing, I’m editing. If I’m not editing, I’m sharing—sending flares from my lighthouse so readers can find the shore I’ve drawn by hand. The work doesn’t pause when inspiration does. The tide moves with or without me, and the only way to get anywhere is to put an oar in the water every day, even when the fog is thick.

In AR, everything means more than it looks. A mug of coffee stops being a mug. Steam rolls out like sea fog over the harbor city I sketched in a January notebook—the one with crooked alleys and market bells and a lighthouse whose stair treads know my footsteps by now. The keyboard isn’t plastic and wires; it’s a compass that points toward scenes I haven’t met and scenes I’m avoiding. The cursor blinks like a beacon: here, here, here. Come back to work.

Characters are the first to step through. They don’t knock; they appear mid-argument, mid-laugh, mid-betrayal, dragging weather from their world into mine. A woman with ink-stained fingers and a secret she thinks is hers to keep sits across a table I’ve never owned, tapping out a rhythm that nags me until I write it. A courier with a map stitched into his jacket refuses to sleep until I let him miss his train. They bring me their trouble and their hope and ask me to be brave enough to tell the truth about both.

Writing is the first excavation. It’s the rush of discovering a bone in the sand and imagining the whole animal in a heartbeat. Then comes editing—the archaeology that happens with a brush instead of a shovel. Line by line, brush, brush, brush. I dig out the clean edges of the story from the clay of my habits. I cut the clever lines that don’t serve the skeleton. I sand away the splinters of scenes that snag but don’t support.

Editing is humbling. It asks: if you were a reader with a train to catch and twenty minutes to spare, would you keep turning pages? It makes you honest. It makes you protective of the reader’s time like it’s your own. It teaches you that your favorite sentence is sometimes the one that has to go.

Then there’s the sharing. I used to call it marketing and feel like I’d swapped my compass for a billboard, but that was before I understood it as lighthouse work. A story without a reader is a ship locked in the bottle: complete, exquisite, invisible. So I keep the glass polished. I write the note that says, “This is the world waiting inside,” and I send it in a thousand bottles. I accept that some will wash back to my own feet. I light the lamp again tomorrow. Maintenance isn’t glamorous, but neither is missing land because the light went out.

What did I trade for this? The easy glow of someone else’s story. The comfort of predictable arcs and neat resolutions. I traded hours that evaporated into hours that accrue. The time I used to float became time I build.

Not all trades feel noble. There are nights when the couch calls me by name, when the news scrolls like a slow-motion car wreck and every good show has three seasons ready to swallow me whole. There are mornings when the alarm sounds like a dare. I don’t always win. But I keep a little ledger—a trade log that tells me, honestly, what I gave up and what I made instead.

Gave up: an hour of television, a mindless scroll, a snack I didn’t need. Built instead: 827 words that moved a character from lying to telling the truth. Reshaped a chapter so the secret doesn’t leak too soon. Jotted a note about how the lighthouse uses a lens I’d never heard of before—Fresnel, a word that tastes like a bell.

Some nights the ledger holds only this: showed up. Sat with the blank and did not run. That counts. That’s a bead on the string.

Is it worth it? I don’t pretend I don’t miss the weightless time. Ease is its own kind of bliss. But there’s another kind: the exhale that comes when a paragraph clicks into place after a week of sanding. The email that says, “I brought your character to the doctor with me; she kept me company in the waiting room.” The message that says, “I didn’t think anyone knew how this felt until I read your chapter.” Those are the moments when the ledger pays interest.

Author Reality is not glamorous. It’s not a montage scored to moody piano. It’s a series of ordinary choices that turn into extraordinary pages. It is the practice of saying no to something pleasant so you can say yes to something that will outlast you. It’s a room you have to reenter every day because the door locks when you leave. And it is, somehow, always worth the key.

Maybe you feel the familiar itch in your palms. The tug toward building instead of consuming. The quiet knowing that you are meant to make something you cannot yet see the edges of. If that’s you, come with me. We can navigate together, even in different boats.

Here’s how to open your AR door:

For one week, switch off the one-eyed monster. Thirty minutes a day is enough to crack the seam between here and there. Put your remote in a drawer, set a timer, and let silence stretch long enough to get uncomfortable. On the other side of discomfort is a voice that wants to talk to you.

Choose your role each day so you don’t fight your own weather. Calm sea? Write new words, even if they’re ugly. Wind picking up? Edit yesterday’s draft with gentle eyes. Fog horn blowing? Share a piece—a paragraph, a line, a feeling—with someone who might need it. Writing, editing, sharing. Every day has a job.

Keep a tiny trade log. One line. What you traded. What you built. Gave up: 40 minutes of scrolling. Built: 3 new pages and a better scene transition. Gave up: a second helping of dessert. Built: the energy to reread my own work without hating it. The log is proof. The log is a map.

Offer a postcard from your AR. A sentence, a sketch of a character, a logline that scares you a little to say out loud. Tell me why it matters to you. We anchor each other when we speak our worlds into air.

You don’t need a headset to live in augmented reality. You need intention. You need a door you’re willing to close and a light you’re willing to switch on. You need the courage to choose your story over the millions that want to borrow your attention for free and charge you with regret later.

I won’t pretend it’s easy to keep that light burning. But I can promise this: the worlds we build in AR have a way of building us back. They give us patience and precision and a tenderness for our own imperfect drafts. They teach us to wait for the fog to lift and to move forward anyway, even when it doesn’t. They send back echoes in the shape of readers who bring our characters to breakfast, to chemotherapy, to bed. They make meaning out of minutes.

The light is on. The keys are warm. The door is unlocked. If you’re ready, step into your AR. Leave your shoes at the threshold and carry only what you need: your stubbornness, your curiosity, a pen that doesn’t mind being chewed. I’ll be in the lighthouse, keeping watch, sending signals. When your boat appears on the horizon, I’ll wave you in.

We have worlds to make.

#WritersLife #BookTok #Bookstagram #WritingCommunity #AmWriting #IndieAuthor #WritersOfInstagram #AuthorTok #WritersOfTwitter #WritersOfX #Worldbuilding

Avoid Marketing Mistakes: Tips for Authors

When you flush money down the shitter expecting results, you’re not just throwing a party for your dignity—you’re throwing it a surprise funeral. Spoiler alert: the porcelain throne isn’t some magical fountain of success. It’s not going to spit out gold bars or a winning lottery ticket. No, it’s just a glorified trash can for bad decisions and the aftermath of your Taco Bell binge. And let’s be real, the only thing you’re going to find in there is regret, a questionable smell, and the faint echo of your own stupidity.
Seriously, what were you expecting? A genie to pop out and grant you three wishes? Hate to break it to you, but the only thing coming out of that toilet is the ghost of last night’s tequila and the shattered remains of your self-esteem. Congratulations, you’ve officially turned your bathroom into a shrine for poor life choices. Light a candle. Say a prayer. And for the love of God, stop flushing your hopes and dreams down the crapper.

So, my book, Stupid Shit: A Survival Guide for a World Gone Mad, is almost ready to drop, and now it’s time to tackle the beast that is marketing. And let’s be honest—marketing can feel like trying to sell ice to penguins while wearing a clown suit. But hey, if you’re writing a book about stupid shit, you’re already halfway to genius. The trick is to avoid doing stupid shit while marketing your book. I know people who’ve written books, slapped them on Amazon, and then sat back waiting for the million-dollar checks to roll in. Should we tell them? Or just let them keep refreshing their bank accounts in blissful ignorance?

Then there are the people who pay someone else to do their marketing for them. Because nothing screams “I’m invested in my book” like outsourcing the entire process to someone who couldn’t give two shits if your book sells or ends up as a coaster for their coffee mug. Let’s be real—these people don’t care about your literary masterpiece on why Rome really fell. They’re not sitting there thinking, “Wow, this author’s insights into ancient history are going to change the world!” No, they’re thinking, “How fast can I slap together a half-assed Facebook ad and still charge them $500?”
If you’re going to be an author, you’ve got to face the cold, hard truth: unless you’ve got the luck of the Irish, or 50 shades of luck in the form of a billionaire with a fetish for spanking young women with tender white bottoms, you’re going to have to work a little harder. And no, I don’t mean “harder” in the Christian Grey sense. I mean you’re going to have to dive headfirst into the murky, soul-sucking waters of marketing your own damn book.

Because here’s the thing: no one is coming to save you. There’s no knight in shining armor galloping in on a horse made of Amazon algorithms to rescue your sales. You’re not Anastasia Steele, and your book isn’t going to magically seduce the masses just by existing. You’ve got to put in the work. You’ve got to convince people that your book is worth their time, their money, and their precious attention span, which, let’s be honest, is shorter than a TikTok video these days.

So, unless you’re sitting on a pile of cash and a dream that some marketing guru is going to turn your novel into the next Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s time to roll up your sleeves and get to work. Because the only thing worse than writing a book no one reads is paying someone else to pretend they care about it while they’re secretly Googling “how to make passive income without trying.”

Many people get on Twitter or Facebook and do what…Spam.
You know that guy who sends 16 identical pitches to random blogs in five hours? Yeah, don’t be that guy. Spamming your book everywhere is like farting in an elevator—it’s loud, obnoxious, and everyone hates you for it. Instead, focus on connecting with your actual audience. Who are they? People who love sarcasm, humor, and a healthy dose of WTF moments. Speak to them directly, not to the void. The void doesn’t buy books. The void doesn’t even have a credit card.
Learn from the Snowqueen’s Icedragon (Yes, That’s a Real Thing)

Let’s take a moment to appreciate E.L. James, the queen of turning fan fiction into a global phenomenon. Back in 2009, she wrote Fifty Shades of Grey as Twilight fan fiction under the pseudonym “Snowqueen’s Icedragon.” (Yes, really. Let that sink in.) She posted it on fanfiction.net, where she tapped into an existing fanbase of people who were already thirsty for sparkly vampires and awkward romance. Genius, right? She then moved her story to her own website, self-published it, and let word-of-mouth do the heavy lifting. By the time Hollywood came knocking, she was already rolling in cash and probably laughing maniacally while swimming in a pool of royalty checks. Moral of the story? Know your audience, and don’t be afraid to embrace the absurd.

Know Your Audience (Hint: It’s Not Karen from Accounting)
If you’re marketing your book to “everyone,” you’re marketing it to no one. Your book isn’t for everyone—In my case my audience is people who appreciate humor, sarcasm, and the absurdity of modern life.

Who is yours? Lean into that. Your ideal reader isn’t Karen from accounting who spends her weekends manifesting her dream life with crystals and self-help books.

My reader is the person who laughs at fart jokes, wonders why the world is so damn ridiculous, and probably has a meme folder labeled “For When I Lose Faith in Humanity.”
Social Media: Stop Screaming “BUY MY BOOK” Like a Lunatic.

If your social media strategy is just “BUY MY BOOK” on repeat, you’re doing it wrong. Social media is like a party—if you’re the guy standing in the corner shouting about your book, people will avoid you like you’ve got the plague. Instead, In my case I will share funny anecdotes, behind-the-scenes moments, or even snippets of the book.

The world is too damned serious and I want to make people laugh, make them think, and then—then—tell them about my book.

Balance is key. Think of it like foreplay. You don’t just dive in screaming, “BUY MY BOOK!” You warm them up first. Buy them dinner. Tell them a joke. Then hit them with the sales pitch.
Start Marketing Before You’re Ready (Because You’ll Never Be Ready)

Waiting until your book is out to start marketing is like showing up to a potluck with an empty plate. Start building hype now. Share your writing process, tease your cover design, or post about the stupid shit that inspired your book. The earlier you start connecting with your audience, the more invested they’ll be when your book drops. And remember, it’s not about follower counts or newsletter subscribers—it’s about quality over quantity. A small, engaged audience is worth more than a million bots or disinterested followers. Treat your audience like gold. Or at least like a really good burrito. Both are precious.

I know way too many authors who don’t give a shit—or even two fucks—about their audience. And let me tell you, folks, that ain’t gonna fly. Your audience isn’t just some faceless blob of people who magically buy your book because you exist. They’re your peeps. Your tribe. The people who are willing to spend their hard-earned cash on your ramblings about why Rome really fell or whatever other nonsense you’ve decided to write about. If you treat them like a pot pie you left in the air fryer too long—burnt, forgotten, and stinking up the place—they’re going to do what any self-respecting human would do: set off the fire alarm, leave your ass hungry, and never come back.

Here’s the thing: your audience is the lifeblood of your book. Without them, you’re just some weirdo shouting into the void. And the void doesn’t buy books. The void doesn’t leave reviews. The void doesn’t even care that you exist. So, if you’re not willing to put in the effort to connect with your readers, you might as well pack it up now and save yourself the embarrassment of watching your Amazon ranking plummet faster than your self-esteem after reading a one-star review.

Treat Your Audience Like Gold (Not Like That Mystery Meat in the Back of Your Freezer)
Your audience isn’t stupid. They can tell when you’re phoning it in. If you’re just throwing your book out there and hoping for the best, they’ll notice. And they’ll leave. Fast. Think of your audience like a delicate soufflé—you’ve got to nurture them, pay attention to them, and for the love of God, don’t slam the oven door by ignoring their needs. Otherwise, they’ll collapse into a sad, deflated mess, and you’ll be left wondering why no one’s buying your book.

So, how do you keep your audience happy? Simple: give a shit. Engage with them. Talk to them. Make them feel like they’re part of something special. Because if you don’t, they’ll find someone else who will. And trust me, there’s no shortage of authors out there who are more than happy to steal your readers while you’re busy treating them like yesterday’s leftovers.

Don’t Be That Author Who Thinks They’re Too Cool for Their Readers

You know the type. The author who thinks they’re some literary god, too busy basking in their own brilliance to bother with the people who actually read their work. Newsflash: you’re not Hemingway. And even if you were, Hemingway would probably tell you to stop being such a pretentious asshole and buy your readers a drink. Your audience doesn’t owe you anything. They don’t have to read your book. They don’t have to leave you glowing reviews. And they sure as hell don’t have to stick around if you treat them like crap.

So, here’s the deal: if you want your audience to care about you, you’ve got to care about them first. Show them some love. Make them laugh. Give them a reason to stick around. Because at the end of the day, your audience isn’t just a bunch of random assholes—they’re the reason your book exists. Treat them like it.

Don’t Be Afraid to Be Bold (Or a Little Stupid)
My book is called Stupid Shit, so you better believe I’m going all-in on audacious marketing. Humor, sarcasm, and a touch of absurdity to grab attention. Because let’s face it, the world is already full of stupid shit—my book is here to make sense of it. Or at least laugh at it.

Marketing doesn’t have to be a soul-sucking exercise in futility. It can actually be fun. Just remember: don’t spam, don’t rely on bots, and don’t try to be everything to everyone. Focus on your audience, be genuine, and let your personality shine through. After all, the world is already drowning in stupid shit—my book is here to be the life raft. Or at least the inflatable pool noodle.
Sign up for e-mails, subscribe, you know the drill.

I have to get back to work on editing 1300 Feet Per Second which is a thriller.
Next time we visit I will share my writing techniques regarding letting sleeping dogs nap while I work on something else and then return to wake them up and get them howling.
-Best

Navigating the Challenges of Writing in the AI Era

I had lunch with a dear friend recently—a lovely person who discovered that writing is, in fact, a business. Yes, a business. Like selling hot dogs or running a laundromat, except with more existential dread and fewer health inspections. Over sandwiches, we discussed the latest in literary absurdity: AI-driven software that can crank out an entire book faster than you can say, “What the actual fuck?” Apparently (and I can’t confirm this, but it sounds stupid enough to be true), Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) now limits authors to uploading no more than three books a day. Three. A. Day. Because, you know, that’s a totally normal output for a human being and not at all a sign that Skynet is moonlighting as a romance novelist.

Let’s talk about writing a book the way most authors do—or at least the way we used to before AI started pooping out novels like a malfunctioning vending machine. Writing a book used to be a deeply personal, soul-crushing process that required creativity, discipline, and the kind of stubbornness usually reserved for toddlers refusing to eat broccoli. Here’s how it went down in the pre-AI era:

1. Generating Ideas

Back in the day, authors had to rely on their own brains to come up with ideas. No ChatGPT, no Bard, no “AI Muse 3000.” Just raw, unfiltered human creativity. Inspiration came from life experiences, dreams, or that one weird conversation you overheard at Starbucks where someone said, “I don’t care if it’s illegal, I’m marrying the ferret.” Writers carried notebooks everywhere, jotting down ideas like lunatics scribbling manifestos.

For example, when I wrote a book about sailing, I didn’t just Google “how to sail” and call it a day. No, I lived it. I chartered a sailboat, had the crew walk me through the process, and spent the day pretending I was Captain Jack Sparrow (minus the eyeliner and rum). That night, when I lay down in my hotel bed, the room was still swaying. That’s the kind of detail you can’t fake. That’s world-building, baby.

2. Outlining the Story

Once you had an idea, you had to outline it. This was where the real masochism began. You’d map out the plot, develop characters with backstories more complicated than your family drama, and, if you were writing sci-fi or fantasy, create entire worlds with their own rules, languages, and economies. It was like playing God, except no one worshipped you, and you didn’t get a day off.

Some writers “pantsed” their way through the story (a.k.a. winging it like a drunk pilot), while others meticulously planned every chapter. I personally use a beat sheet from Save the Cat, because apparently, I enjoy turning my creative process into a spreadsheet. Nothing says “art” like Excel.

3. Writing the First Draft

Ah, the first draft. The part where you sit down, stare at a blank page, and think, “Why the hell did I decide to do this?” Writing was slow, painful, and required the kind of discipline usually associated with monks or Navy SEALs. You’d aim for a specific word count each day, and if you hit it, you’d reward yourself with chocolate or alcohol—or both.

Writer’s block was a constant companion. Without AI to suggest ideas, you had to push through it on your own. Some people went for walks. Others screamed into the void. I personally found inspiration in coffee, wine, and the occasional existential crisis.

4. Revising and Editing

Once the first draft was done, the real torture began: revising. You’d read your manuscript over and over, catching typos, fixing plot holes, and wondering why your protagonist sounded like a cardboard cutout. Beta readers would give you feedback like, “I didn’t connect with the characters,” or “This part was boring,” and you’d resist the urge to reply, “Well, Karen, maybe you’re boring.”

If you could afford it, you’d hire a professional editor. If not, you’d edit it yourself, which was like performing surgery on your own child. Painful, messy, and guaranteed to leave scars.

5. Research

Research is the necessary evil of writing, especially for non-fiction or historically accurate fiction. It’s the part of the process where you willingly dive headfirst into a rabbit hole of facts, only to emerge hours later wondering why you now know the mating habits of 18th-century pigeons but still haven’t figured out what your protagonist’s name is. Research is both a blessing and a curse—it gives your work depth and believability, but it also makes you question your life choices when you’re Googling things like, “How long does it take for a body to decompose in a swamp?” and praying your internet provider isn’t judging you.

For example, if you’re writing sci-fi, you might find yourself studying quantum physics or emerging technologies, which sounds impressive until you realize you’re just trying to figure out how to explain time travel without sounding like a lunatic. Or, if you’re me, you might Google “how to sabotage an airplane” and then spend the next week convinced that the FBI is about to kick down your door. I mean, imagine it: covert agents taping over your outdoor cameras, RF jamming your phone so you can’t call for help, cutting the power to your house, shooting your dogs (RIP, Fido), and snipers perched in trees a mile away, just waiting for you to answer the door in your pajamas—or, let’s be honest, nude—so they can interrogate you about your questionable search history.

Wait. I never Googled that. Nope. Never happened. But damn, wouldn’t that make a killer chapter in a thriller? Picture it: the protagonist is a writer who accidentally stumbles onto some classified government conspiracy while researching their next book. Suddenly, their innocent Google searches turn into a one-way ticket to paranoia-ville, complete with black SUVs tailing them and mysterious men in suits showing up at their local coffee shop. Someone call Netflix—I think I just wrote their next hit series.

But seriously, research is the backbone of good writing. Whether you’re crafting a historical epic or a sci-fi adventure, you need to know your shit. As Patricia Leslie points out, research is essential for both fiction and non-fiction writers. It helps develop characters, make settings believable, and weave fact and fiction together so seamlessly that readers can’t tell where one ends and the other begins

For non-fiction, accuracy is king. For fiction, it’s more like a benevolent dictator—you can bend the rules a little, but you still need to know what you’re doing.

The trick is to use research as a tool, not a crutch. Sure, you could spend weeks poring over vintage newspapers or interviewing experts, but at some point, you have to stop researching and start writing. Otherwise, you’ll end up with a head full of useless trivia and no book to show for it. And let’s be honest, no one’s going to be impressed that you know the exact dimensions of a 16th-century guillotine unless you actually use that knowledge in your story.

So, to all the writers out there: research responsibly. And maybe clear your browser history every now and then, just in case. You never know when the FBI might decide to pay you a visit.

6. Finding a Publisher

Before self-publishing, authors had to grovel at the feet of literary agents and publishers. You’d write query letters, pitch your book, and wait months for a response, only to get a rejection that said, “Not for us, but good luck!” It was like online dating, except instead of ghosting you, they sent a polite “no.”

7. Marketing and Promotion

Even after all that, the work wasn’t done. Authors had to promote their books like used car salesmen. Book tours, media appearances, social media campaigns—you name it. You’d beg people to buy your book, and they’d say, “I’ll wait for the movie.” Thanks, Aunt Linda.

The AI Problem

Now, thanks to AI, anyone can “write” a book in minutes. But let’s be honest: these programs aren’t writing books; they’re shitting them out. And the result? A flood of mediocre, soulless content clogging up the literary world like a fatberg in a sewer.

I’m all for technology as a tool. Word, Grammarly, ProWritingAid—these are great. But AI-generated books? That’s where I draw the line. I’m pushing for legislation that requires AI-generated books to wear a big, ugly label that says, “This was written by a robot.” Readers deserve to know if the “author” of their favorite romance novel is a human or a glorified toaster.

Final Thoughts

Writing is a job. A hard, thankless, occasionally soul-sucking job. There are days when I stare at my manuscript and think, “Why am I doing this?” But then I remember: because I love it. Because it’s who I am. And because the world needs more books written by real people with real stories to tell.

My book, Stupid Shit, is coming soon. Subscribe today so you can grab a copy when it drops. Trust me, it’ll be worth it. Or don’t. I’m not your mom.

-Best