Tag: writing

Mastering Hooks: Capture Readers in 3 Seconds

Mastering Hooks: Capture Readers in 3 Seconds

Struggling with the business side of writing? You’re not alone. Here’s a candid look at turning pages into paychecks—join the conversation.

Capturing and Maintaining Reader Attention in the Age of Overload

In a world where your readers’ phones buzz every few seconds, attention is the rarest resource. Great ideas aren’t enough. To connect, you need to cut through noise, spark curiosity fast, and keep delivering value line by line. This post breaks down why attention is harder to earn today—and practical ways to win and keep it.

Information Overload: The New Reality

Did I just interrupt your doomscrolling? Good—that’s part of the problem I’m writing against. I’m wading through the same flood you are: more to read, watch, and hear than any one person can hold. New posts, newsletters, videos, and podcasts never stop. Even careful, polished work gets buried under the pile.

Why Your Hook Only Gets 3 Seconds (and Why You Should Panic a Little)

Okay, writers, let’s be real for a second: your hook has the lifespan of junk mail. You know what I’m talking about—that envelope that lands in your hands, gets a three-second glance, and then, unless it screams “Open me!”, takes a one-way trip to the trash (or, as my mom used to call it, the “circular filing cabinet”). Your readers are doing the exact same thing with your title, subtitle, and opening line. If you don’t grab them immediately, well… let’s just say your hard work is headed for the digital equivalent of the recycling bin.

Your job? Be that one letter worth opening. You know the one—the one that makes you pause, unfold it, and actually read the thing. Let’s talk about how to make your writing that irresistible.

What Makes a Winning Hook?

A good hook isn’t just about sounding clever—it’s about making readers stop their scrolling, squint at your words, and think, “Wait, this is for me!” Here’s what your hook should do:

Signal relevance fast: “This is for YOU.” Not some vague “writer” or “reader”—you.

Make a clear promise: “Here’s what you’ll get if you keep reading.”

Stir curiosity: “You don’t know this yet, but you’re about to find out.”

Be specific: Use names, numbers, or real-world examples.

Set stakes: Show them what’s in it for them—time saved, pain avoided, or success achieved.

Sound human: No fluff, no jargon, no robotic nonsense.

Writing is Junk Mail (Bear With Me…)

Your title = The envelope sender: If you don’t seem trustworthy, intriguing, or relevant, trash.

Your subtitle/preview = The teaser on the envelope: What’s inside? Spell out the benefit in one clean sentence.

Your opening line = The first sentence of the letter: Hit them with tension, a question, or a surprise.

Subheads and bold lines = The P.S. on the letter: Reinforce your promise with quick, scannable takeaways.

If any of these pieces are vague, boring, or confusing, guess what? Your reader “files” you—and not in a good way.

The 3-Second Test

Before you publish, ask yourself three questions. Score each from 1–5:

Clarity: Can a stranger tell who this is for and what they’ll get?

Curiosity: Is there an unresolved question, tension, or surprise?

Credibility: Are there specifics (names, numbers, situations) to back this up?

If any score less than a 3, it’s time to rewrite. Sorry, but you owe it to your readers—and your ego.

Hook Formulas That Actually Work

Let’s get practical. These formulas are like cheat codes for writing irresistible hooks:

Problem + Time Frame + Outcome

Example: “Spend 10 minutes today and cut your email replies in half this week.”

Surprising Stat + So What

Example: “Half your readers leave by paragraph two—here’s how to keep the rest.”

Confession + Pivot

Example: “I lost my first 1,000 subscribers—here’s what I did differently on #1,001.”

Question + Consequence

Example: “What if your opening line is costing you 80% of your readers?”

Contrarian Angle + Benefit

Example: “Stop outlining—story your scenes instead.”

Tiny Promise + Clear Benefit

Example: “One sentence that makes every paragraph pull its weight.”

Specific Who + Outcome

Example: “Freelance writers: the 7-word reply that doubles approvals.”

Before-and-After Examples (Because We’ve All Been There)

Weak: “Let’s talk about writing hooks.”

Strong: “Your first line decides if your work gets read—or trashed in three seconds.”

Weak: “Here are marketing tips.”

Strong: “A non-gross way to sell your book in 15 minutes a day.”

Weak: “My editing process.”

Strong: “How I cut 27% of fluff—and gained 40% more readers.”

Weak (Fiction): “A woman faces a challenge.”

Strong: “She was supposed to be dead by dawn—and had a meeting at nine.”

Weak (Memoir/Essay): “Work overwhelmed me.”

Strong: “I didn’t quit my job—I misplaced it under 97 unread emails.”

A Quick Workflow to Nail Your Hook

Write 10 versions of your hook. Yes, 10. Just do it.

Underline your nouns and verbs. If they’re vague, swap them for concrete ones.

Add stakes: time, money, emotion, or risk.

Pick a tension device: question, contrast, surprise, or confession.

Read it out loud. Can you grasp it in one breath?

Do the phone test: glance at your hook for three seconds. If it doesn’t grab you instantly, rewrite.

Pitfalls to Avoid

Clever but unclear: If no one understands your wordplay, it doesn’t matter.

Throat-clearing: “In today’s world…” Stop. Just start where the energy is.

Overpromising: Big claims with zero specifics = instant distrust.

Passive voice and hedges: “might,” “could possibly,” “somewhat.” Nope. Be bold and direct.

Your Hook is Your Envelope

At the end of the day, your hook is the envelope that keeps your work from being trashed. Make it unmistakably for your reader, promise a real payoff, and make that promise impossible to ignore. Because, let’s be honest, we’re all one bad hook away from the literary recycling bin—and nobody wants to end up there.

Now, go write a hook that makes me stop scrolling. I dare you.

And while your at it, like, follow, share and help a fellow author out.

Thanks!

If the interests is there I will post more articles like this to assist you in your career of turning your paperback into a paycheck.

Best

Author Scott

How Authors Can Thrive in the Digital Age

How Authors Can Thrive in the Digital Age

A lot of you are staring at flat sales and asking me the same thing I see in my inbox every week: are people still reading?

Short answer: yes. Longer answer: hell yes, but reading has changed outfits. People still love romance, fantasy, and thrillers, yet a lot of them are grabbing audiobooks, e-books, and snackable serials on Wattpad and Substack. Attention is a fragile little beast, so readers also go for shorter, punchier stuff, or they want summaries and adaptations like podcasts and quick recaps that fit between life, work, and whatever Netflix is feeding them tonight.

Where Are People Reading?

  • Online platforms: Wattpad, Kindle Direct Publishing, Substack, and even Reddit are buzzing with new voices and weirdly passionate niche communities.
  • Social media: Instagram’s Bookstagram, TikTok’s BookTok, and Twitter’s BookTwitter can catapult a book from “who the hell is this?” to “I saw that everywhere.”
  • Audiobooks and podcasts: Multitaskers unite. People listen while commuting, cleaning, working out, or pretending to stretch.

Why, you might ask. Have you listened to the news? Then you know the answer.

How Can an Unknown Writer Get Known Today?

1) Social media is a tool, not a religion

  • Use it if it helps. It’s great for visibility, networking, and actually talking to readers, but it shouldn’t swallow your writing time.
  • Yes, some authors thrive with little or no social presence. They are the exception. For most of us mortals, social helps put the work in front of eyeballs.

2) Other ways to get noticed

  • Self-publishing: KDP and Wattpad can get your work to readers without asking anyone’s permission.
  • Newsletter and email list: Gold. You own that relationship, and it beats shouting into the algorithm void.
  • Collaborations: Guest posts, podcast interviews, swaps with other writers. Borrow audiences like a pro.
  • Local events: Bookstores, libraries, and fairs still move the needle. Also, free cookies sometimes.

3) If you do social, do it smart

  • Go where your readers hang out. TikTok is huge for YA and romance. Twitter is strong for sci-fi and literary fiction.
  • Post more than “buy my book.” Share behind-the-scenes bits, the messy writing process, personal stories, and jump into reader conversations. Be a human, not a billboard.

The Business of Writing: From A to Z

Writing a great story matters. Editing matters. Neither will save you if you treat your book like a message in a bottle. Authors are not just artists. You are a business. That means strategy, systems, and marketing that moves people to talk about your work and you.This is not selling out. This is how you get read.

What “Business” Means for Authors

  • Product: Your book, your series, your backlist, your bonus content.
  • Brand: The promise you make to readers and the vibe you deliver every time.
  • Distribution: How your work reaches people, both digital and physical.
  • Marketing: How you attract attention and convert it into actual readers.
  • Operations: Calendars, budgets, deadlines, tools, contracts, taxes. The glamorous stuff.
  • Analytics: Knowing what works so you can do more of it and stop guessing.

The A to Z of Author Biz

  • A — Audience: Define a reader persona, not a vague blob. Who are they, what do they read, where do they hang out, why do they care.
  • B — Brand: One line that nails your promise. Keep your covers, copy, and tone consistent.
  • C — Copywriting: Your blurb and ad hooks must carry their own weight. Clarity beats clever.
  • D — Distribution: Go wide, or go exclusive. Pick based on genre norms and your goals.
  • E — Email: Build a list. Own your audience. Send value, not spam.
  • F — Funnel: Attract, capture, nurture, convert, delight. Simple beats messy.
  • G — Goals: Monthly word count, quarterly launches, revenue targets. Write them down.
  • H — Hook: A sharp premise plus emotional stakes. Put it everywhere.
  • I — IP: Protect your rights. Think audio, translation, merch, adaptations.
  • J — Joint ventures: Cross-promos, anthology teams, podcast swaps. Borrow trust.
  • K — Keywords: Metadata matters. Help stores and search engines find you.
  • L — Launch: ARC teams, preorders, schedule, assets, reviews on day one.
  • M — Marketing: Sustained, not frantic. Test small, then scale.
  • N — Nurture: Behind-the-scenes updates, freebies, bonus chapters, Q&A.
  • O — Outreach: Book clubs, libraries, indie bookstores, local media.
  • P — Positioning and Price: Know your shelf. Price to market, then experiment.
  • Q — Quality control: Edit, proof, format. Readers forgive a lot, but not sloppy.
  • R — Reviews: Make it easy to leave them. Never argue with a reviewer.
  • S — Social proof: Testimonials, awards, charts, screenshots. Use them.
  • T — Testing: Covers, blurbs, ad images, first pages. Let data win.
  • U — USP: Your unique angle. Say it plainly. Repeat it often.
  • V — Visibility: SEO, social, ads, partnerships, events. Stack your channels.
  • W — Word of mouth: The engine you build on purpose, not by accident.
  • X — X-factor: A signature element readers remember. A tone, trope, theme, or world.
  • Y — You, Inc.: Protect your time and energy. Systems beat willpower.
  • Z — Zero regret finish: Close loops, deliver on promises, ask for the next action.

Marketing That Gets People Talking

People share what makes them feel smart, seen, or entertained. Give them something to pass along.

  • Talk triggers: A bold premise, an unexpected twist, a controversial question, a jaw-drop world rule. Bake one into the book and the blurb.
  • Shareables: Quote cards, short audio clips, 20–40 second video hooks, tidy behind-the-scenes photos. Make it easy to repost.
  • Reader roles: ARC team, street team, beta readers, name-a-character contests, choice-of-cover votes.
  • Communities: Goodreads groups, Discord servers, Reddit threads, TikTok and Instagram niches. Show up where conversations already exist.
  • Micro-influencers: Bookstagrammers, BookTok creators, niche podcasts, genre newsletters. Smaller audiences can convert better.
  • Book clubs: Offer discussion guides, Zoom drop-ins, signed bookplates, discounts for bulk.
  • Local buzz: Libraries, indie bookstores, college lit groups, hometown papers. Real humans, real momentum.

Your Visibility Stack

  • Home base: A simple website and an email list. You own both.
  • One primary social channel: Go where your readers actually are. Post consistently, not constantly.
  • Retail pages that convert: Strong cover, tight blurb, dialed metadata, compelling Look Inside.
  • Ads as accelerant: Start tiny on Amazon, Meta, or TikTok. Test audiences and creatives.
  • Search and SEO: Author name, series name, genre keywords. Make Google your friend.

A Simple Weekly System

  • Write: 5 sessions. Protect them like a dragon hoard.
  • Nurture: 1 email or community post with value or a peek behind the curtain.
  • Grow: 1 outreach action. Pitch a podcast, DM a creator, apply for a promo.
  • Promote: 2 evergreen posts or clips that spotlight your hook.
  • Measure: 20 minutes on metrics. Keep doing what moves the needle.

Metrics That Matter

  • Email list growth and open rate
  • Conversion on your retail pages
  • Cost per click and cost per new reader
  • Read-through across a series
  • Reviews per 100 sales
  • Time on page for your first chapter or sample

Common Mistakes to Avoid

  • Hiding behind the book: You are part of the product. Readers follow people.
  • Launching cold: Build a list and a conversation before release week.
  • Random acts of marketing: Pick a plan and stick to it for at least one quarter.
  • Chasing every trend: Choose one lane you can sustain.
  • Forgetting the back end: No clear next step means lost momentum.

Make Them Talk About You

  • Own a theme or hill to die on: A point of view readers can quote at dinner.
  • Name your world or promise: A catchy series name or manifesto line helps memory stick.
  • Deliver delight moments: Unexpected bonus scenes, secret epilogues, surprise art drops.
  • Invite participation: Polls, challenges, reading sprints, live Q&A.
  • Close with an ask: If you loved it, tell a friend, leave a review, join the list. Simple and direct.

Now, for all this free advice…My latest creation The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit is almost ready for publication. If you like what you read, give me a follow, a thumbs up, hell repost it for me because what I have written will not only assist other writers but this book which is as large as “The Big Beautiful Bill.” is almost ready.

Thanks and much Love…

AuthorScott

Is it him, or is it you?

Is it him, or is it you?

Let’s talk about this mess we call political theater, shall we? Because holy shit, the amount of stupid shit happening on the world stage these days is staggering. It’s like watching a soap opera, but with worse scripts, uglier actors, and way more assholes. Social media, of course, eats this crap up. Every time a politician stumbles—physically, verbally, or just by existing—you’ve got the same lineup of Twitter warriors ready to pounce. They’re like rabid dogs foaming at the mouth, eager to unleash a fresh “buffoon” meme just so they can feel something inside their cold, dead hearts. But here’s the thing: how much of the shitstorm we see is real, and how much of it is just a big, steaming pile of manufactured chaos? Buckle up, because I’m about to take you behind the curtain of one of the dumbest political spectacles I’ve ever seen.


The UN Incident: A Shitshow for the Ages

Alright, so recently, our fearless president (pause for laughter) was at the United Nations doing his thing—you know, standing at a podium, attempting not to piss off the entire world. Pretty standard day for a world leader.But, oh no, the man looked a little wobbly at the microphone, and the internet collectively shit its pants. Cue the “He’s a moron!” comments. “What a buffoon!” someone shouts. “Did he forget how to human?” chimes in another. Honestly, it’s like a goddamn sport at this point, and these people are playing for the championship title of “Biggest Internet Dickhead.”But wait—because here’s the part no one talks about. You know, the part where the universe decided to fuck with him just to see if he’d break.First, the escalator incident. Picture this: the president and first lady are riding an escalator on their way up to the stage. Seems simple enough, right? WRONG. Because mid-ascent, some genius decides to turn off the goddamn escalator. Who the hell even does that?! I’m not saying it was a secret assassin-level mission to make them faceplant, but let’s be honest—it would’ve made for some killer viral footage. One wrong move, and we’d all be watching a slow-motion tumble meme for the next decade.But wait—because the shitstorm wasn’t done brewing.Next up, our guy makes it to the microphone, probably thinking, “Well, at least I didn’t fall on my face.” And BAM! The teleprompter dies. Just straight-up goes dark like someone unplugged it to charge their phone. Now, I don’t care who you are—when you’re standing in front of the world’s most powerful leaders and your script disappears, you’re gonna sweat a little. Hell, most of us would burst into tears and fake a fainting spell just to GTFO.But not this guy. Oh no. He decides to go rogue and wing it. He cracks some jokes, throws in a few ad-libs, and keeps the train rolling. Classic Trump. Of course, this makes his haters absolutely lose their fucking minds. Because God forbid he tries to lighten the mood when the teleprompter gods have clearly conspired against him.


The Double Standard: Could You Do Better, Karen?

Let’s take a moment to reflect: What if this shit happened to you? Imagine you’re at work, giving the most important presentation of your life, and suddenly someone yanks the PowerPoint out from under you. Oh, and they also turned off the elevator on your way up, so you had to awkwardly stumble into the room, already sweaty and pissed off.Could you keep your cool? Would you ad-lib your way to greatness? Or would you stand there like a deer in headlights while Brenda from accounting live-tweets your breakdown? Be honest—you’d fucking crumble. But when it’s a public figure, we just grab our popcorn and laugh like we’re watching a shitty sitcom.


The Reality of Political Theater

Here’s the thing: politics is one big circus. And not the fun kind with popcorn and elephants—it’s the kind where everyone’s drunk, the clowns are creepy, and someone’s probably going to get stabbed. What we see on social media is just the surface-level stupidity, carefully edited for maximum outrage. But behind the scenes? It’s a goddamn war zone. People are setting traps, pulling stunts, and spinning narratives like their lives depend on it.The escalator didn’t just “stop.” The teleprompter didn’t just “malfunction.” Shit like this doesn’t just happen. It’s all part of a bigger game, and we’re the idiots sitting in the bleachers, cheering for the chaos.


Final Thoughts: Humanity Is Exhausting

Look, I get it. Politicians aren’t exactly easy to love. Most of them are rich, out-of-touch, and probably don’t know how much a gallon of milk costs. But at the end of the day, they’re still human. They trip. They sweat. They get sabotaged by escalators and teleprompters from hell. And maybe—just maybe—we should cut them a little slack.Or don’t. Honestly, it’s more fun to watch people lose their shit over stupid things. Just remember: the next time you see a viral clip of someone “failing,” there’s probably more to the story. Or maybe there’s not, and they really are just a buffoon. Either way, political theater is just another chapter in the never-ending saga of stupid shit humans do.

Let’s get one thing straight: if you hate this president, there’s absolutely nothing—and I mean nothing—he could ever do to make you say anything remotely nice about him. Period. Full stop. End of story. He could personally save your dog from a burning building, hand you a wad of cash, and solve your student loan debt, and you’d still find a way to say, “Yeah, but he’s still a dick.”And don’t even get me started on the media. Those guys are like a pack of rabid hyenas, frothing at the mouth to tear apart every single thing he does. The coverage is, what, 97% negative? Ninety-freaking-seven percent. That’s about as close to unanimous hatred as you can get without someone sending out a “Destroy Trump” group email.


Meanwhile, Back in Reality…

Here’s the kicker: the country is actually doing better than it has in years. Let me say that again for the people in the back: things are going pretty damn well.Crime? Down. D.C., which is basically a madhouse on a good day, is somehow safer than it’s been in a while. Your dollar? Worth more. The economy? Chugging along nicely. But does any of that matter to the people who hate him? Hell no. He could literally cure cancer tomorrow—like, “Hey guys, I found the cure, it was in my sock drawer the whole time,”—and the haters would still lose their minds.“Oh, but why didn’t he cure it sooner?”
“This is just a distraction from [insert random scandal here]!”
“Sure, he cured cancer, but what about climate change?”
“Why is he even wearing socks?!”It’s like people are determined to hate him, no matter what. He could walk on water, and they’d just complain about how his shoes got wet.


The Bottom Line: Some People Just Wanna Hate

Look, I’m not saying you have to love the guy. Hell, you don’t even have to like him. But let’s at least be honest here: if you hated him from the start, you’re never going to give him credit for anything. It doesn’t matter what he does. He could fix the economy, solve world hunger, and rescue a kitten from a tree, and you’d still find a way to call him an asshole.And honestly? That says more about you than it does about him.So, go ahead and keep hating. But at some point, maybe take a step back and ask yourself: Am I mad because he’s actually terrible, or am I just mad because it’s trendy to hate him? Either way, congratulations—you’re officially part of the political theater circus. Grab some popcorn and enjoy the show.

Why ‘Ask Your Doctor If Death Is Right for You’ Works

Why ‘Ask Your Doctor If Death Is Right for You’ Works

Years ago I worked at an advertising agency. We had to be creative. Today while watching the news I was shocked by the big pharma ads. The tag line: is death right for you, came to mind.

Thinking back to those days, I formulated an ad campaign that would never get played, but it should. Do we really need pills that keep us hooked on more pills to fix the side effects of those pills?

Tell me what you think.

Alright, team. Gather ‘round. I’ve got a pitch for you that’s equal parts brilliance, absurdity, and just the right amount of “what the actual f***.” You’re going to love it. Or hate it. Either way, we’re making history—and probably pissing off Big Pharma in the process.

Picture this: A pharmaceutical commercial. But not just any pharmaceutical commercial. Oh no, this isn’t your run-of-the-mill “cure one thing, destroy seven others” nonsense. This is bold, it’s darkly funny, and it’s honest. Strap in, because I’m about to sell you the next big thing in healthcare advertising.

Opening Scene: A Hallmark Dream

We start with the usual formula—because let’s face it, the best parody thrives on clichés.

Imagine a serene meadow: golden sunlight pouring through the trees, a golden retriever frolicking in slow motion, and a woman spinning in circles like she just discovered her life has been sponsored by Xanax. The piano music? Uplifting. The visuals? Pinterest-worthy. The voiceover? Smooth as silk.

“Are you tired of your minor discomfort? Is that pesky rash ruining your Tuesday? Does your slight headache feel like the universe is conspiring against you? Introducing PanaceaX™—because being mildly inconvenienced is clearly the worst thing that can happen to you.”

Cue the woman laughing with her family. She’s baking cookies with zero regard for her gluten intolerance. The dog’s wagging its tail like it’s auditioning for a Disney movie. You feel warm, cozy, safe. But then… oh, then, the voiceover takes a turn.

The Twist: Side Effects from Hell

“Side effects may include nausea, dizziness, dry mouth, explosive diarrhea, uncontrollable vomiting, hallucinations, existential dread, spontaneous combustion, and, oh yeah—death.”

Pause for dramatic effect.

“Ask your doctor if PanaceaX™ is right for you.”

Now, let’s linger on this for a second. Death. We’re not even trying to sugarcoat it. We’re leaning all the way in. Because, let’s be real—half the drugs on the market already come with side effects that sound like rejected horror movie plots. Why not own it?

The tagline? Simple, catchy, and just the right amount of nihilistic charm:

“PanaceaX™: Because if you’re gonna die anyway, you might as well do it medicated.”

Now, I know what you’re thinking: “But how do we make people laugh about something as horrifying as spontaneous internal bleeding or uncontrollable rage?” Easy. We do what pharmaceutical ads already do—bury it under a montage of happy people living their best lives. Except we call attention to how absolutely insane it is.

The voiceover speeds up, auctioneer-style. You know the drill: “Nausea. Vomiting. Headaches. Diarrhea so explosive it’ll put food poisoning to shame. Dry mouth so bad you’ll think you’ve been licking sandpaper. And for those of you lucky enough to hit the jackpot: sudden personality changes, hallucinations, and the occasional bout of spontaneous combustion. PanaceaX™: Because nothing says ‘healthcare’ like becoming a walking dumpster fire.”

Meanwhile, the visuals continue to show people doing things that have nothing to do with the drug. A dad teaching his kid to ride a bike. A couple on a beach. A grandma knitting a sweater for her cat. No one’s vomiting. No one’s combusting. It’s all lies. But that’s the beauty of it.

Let’s Talk About the Rare Side Effects

Now, this is where we really shine. These aren’t your run-of-the-mill “oops, I sneezed too hard” side effects. Oh no. These are the real gems. The ones that make you question your life choices.

Uncontrollable Rage: Perfect for holiday dinners with the in-laws.

Sudden Hair Loss: Because bald is the new black.

Loss of Taste: Both literal and metaphorical. Say goodbye to your sense of flavor and your fashion sense.

Spontaneous Internal Bleeding: A fun surprise for everyone involved.

Death: The ultimate cure for all ailments. Guaranteed 100% effective every time.

And we have to include this one: “May cause an irrational fear of ducks.” Why? Because it’s weird, it’s random, and it makes people pay attention.

The Irony of It All

Here’s the kicker, folks: The diseases these drugs are treating? They’re usually not that big a deal. Heartburn? Allergies? A little anxiety? You don’t need a pill for that—you need a nap and a decent therapist. But no, we’ve been conditioned to think that every minor inconvenience requires a chemical solution. And let’s be honest, we eat it up. Why? Because the ads show us what we want to see: happiness, health, freedom.

That’s the genius of it. They dangle the perfect life in front of us, and we bite. Even if the fine print basically says, “May cause your organs to implode.”

Final Scene: The Closing Pitch

So here’s how we wrap it up. The screen fades to black. The piano music swells. The logo for PanaceaX™ appears, glowing softly. And the voiceover delivers the final line with just the right amount of smug optimism:

“PanaceaX™: Ask your doctor if death is right for you. (Spoiler alert: It probably is.)”

Cue the woman spinning in the meadow one last time, but this time, she’s holding a giant bottle of PanaceaX™ like it’s the Holy Grail.

Why This Works

This pitch is self-aware, sarcastic, and just unhinged enough to go viral. It pokes fun at the absurdity of pharmaceutical advertising while staying true to the format. It’s dark, it’s funny, and most importantly—it’s memorable. People will be quoting, “Ask your doctor if death is right for you” for years.

So, what do you think? Are we ready to take the pharmaceutical world by storm, or should we just prescribe ourselves a big ol’ dose of “f*** it” and call it a day?

A Taste of Stupid Shit (Coming Soon to a Brain Near You)

That, my friends, is just a tiny sample of the glorious nonsense you’ll find in The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit, which is currently in the editing process. Yes, I’m editing it—because apparently, society frowns upon just flinging raw stupidity into the world without a little polish. Go figure.

I’m hoping to release it in the next few weeks because, let’s be real, the world desperately needs this. We’re drowning in stupidity every day—on TV, on social media, at family reunions—and someone (me) needs to catalog it, mock it, and gift-wrap it for your reading pleasure.

So, do me a favor: subscribe, follow, comment, and tell me what you think. Or don’t. I’m not your mom. But if you do, you’ll get to say you were here before this book becomes the literary equivalent of a viral cat meme. And let’s face it—who doesn’t want that level of cultural credibility?

Go forth, let your voice be heard and spread the word far and wide. Or don’t. No matter what, this book will come to fruition, and it promises to be an exceptionally enjoyable experience. Stay tuned, and prepare for comedy gold written in bite-sized chapters that will have you laughing as if you were at a live show.

-Best

Are Premium Writing Tools Worth the Investment?

Are Premium Writing Tools Worth the Investment?


Writers with a lifelong passion for the written word and the craft of storytelling often recognize the importance of using the right tools to bring their ideas to life. For those who have explored genres ranging from psychological thrillers with dark, erotic edges to humorous works like my work in progress, “The Big Beautiful Book of Stupid Shit,” every project demands a unique approach. Expensive writing tools—designed to refine grammar, enhance prose, and assist with plot development—are becoming an integral part of the writing process. But are they worth the investment for seasoned writers? Let’s explore.
Why Consider Premium Writing Tools?
Writers who are equally fascinated by both the arts and technology often look for ways to combine these passions to improve their craft. Writing tools have evolved far beyond basic spell checkers and are now sophisticated programs capable of analyzing tone, identifying plot holes, and suggesting improvements to elevate any piece of writing.
For authors who work on a wide range of projects—whether humorous critiques, science fiction adventures, or dark psychological thrillers—these tools serve as a valuable second pair of eyes. They ensure that stories remain polished, engaging, and free of errors.
How Writing Tools Can Help (and Where They Shine)
Expensive writing tools offer several features that make them worth the investment. Here’s how they can enhance different aspects of writing:
Grammar and Clarity
Even the most experienced writers can miss grammatical errors, unclear sentences, or awkward phrasing. Tools like Grammarly Premium or ProWritingAid go beyond simple corrections by analyzing sentence structure, suggesting concise alternatives, and highlighting overused phrases. For example, in a psychological thriller, where every word must carry weight, having a tool that ensures clarity is invaluable.
Style and Tone Analysis
Capturing the right tone is crucial in writing. Tools like Hemingway Editor make sure that the writing is accessible and punchy, pointing out overly complex sentences and passive voice. AI-driven tools like Sudowrite take this further by suggesting stylistic changes to match the intended tone, whether it’s sharp wit, emotional vulnerability, or urgent tension.
Plot Development and Story Structure
Writing intricate narratives, such as science fiction or thrillers, often comes with the challenge of spotting plot holes or inconsistencies. Tools like Campfire Pro or Plottr allow writers to map out their stories, track character arcs, and identify gaps in the plot. These tools are particularly helpful when dealing with multi-layered storylines or weaving together multiple timelines.
Research Assistance
Writers with backgrounds in history, literature, or even technical fields like physics understand the importance of research in crafting believable worlds. Tools like Scrivener allow them to organize research alongside their writing, making it easy to reference important details without disrupting their workflow.
Collaborative Feedback
Writing is often a solitary craft, but feedback is essential to growth. Tools like Fictionary provide AI-driven developmental editing, helping assess pacing, tension, and character development. For writers who explore varied genres, having a tool that serves as a digital writing coach can make a significant difference.
Do Writers Really Need Expensive Tools?
For writers serious about honing their craft, premium tools can be a game-changer. These tools aren’t substitutes for creativity or hard work—they’re enhancers. The most compelling stories come from within, but even the best storytellers benefit from tools that refine their work and help their ideas shine.
For instance, while crafting a humorous book like Stupid Shit, tools can ensure comedic timing lands effectively and critiques of absurdity remain sharp. In a psychological thriller, these tools can help ensure tension builds naturally and characters’ motivations stay consistent throughout the narrative.
Balancing Technology with Creativity
Technology is only as effective as the person using it. Writing software cannot replace a writer’s unique voice, perspective, or creative spark. It’s easy to become overly reliant on AI-driven tools, but the heart of any story always comes from the writer.
These tools function more like sophisticated assistants—they highlight technical flaws, streamline the process, and organize ideas, but the artistry remains in the hands of the writer.
Are Expensive Writing Tools Worth It?
For writers passionate about storytelling and willing to embrace technology, investing in premium tools is a wise decision. These tools streamline the writing process, refine ideas, and ensure that every word on the page serves its purpose. Whether crafting an intricate psychological thriller or a humorous critique of human absurdity, writing tools help writers reach new creative heights.
The best advice for writers considering these tools? Start small, experiment, and choose the ones that align with your goals. Remember, writing tools are there to support the craft—not replace it.
Embrace the technology, refine your craft, and keep writing. At the end of the day, the world needs great stories—flaws and all.
What are your thoughts on premium writing tools? Have you used any of the ones mentioned here? Let us know in the comments!

What would you surrender for a story that won’t stop knocking?

What would you surrender for a story that won’t stop knocking?

I surrendered the glow. The soft, blue hum that filled the room after dinner. I set the remote down the way some people set aside sugar for Lent—deliberately, almost ceremonially—like I was laying a coin on a ferryman’s palm. The one-eyed monster blinked into its own reflection, and the living room exhaled. No laugh track. No canned cliffhanger. Only the fridge whispering, the clock ticking, the house going quiet enough for another world to speak.

That was the night my AR clicked on.

Not augmented reality. Author Reality. The dimension that lives behind every closed door and blinking cursor. It doesn’t need a headset, and it doesn’t apologize for being demanding. It’s the world that asks you to show up with the same seriousness you bring to your job, your family, your grief, your joy. It rewards the faithful, and it keeps its secrets from the curious who wander in for a minute and wander back out.

Is it worth it? Depends on what you want from a story: to be carried, or to build the boat.

Here’s the rhythm I’ve learned, the three-beat cadence of making a book: if I’m not writing, I’m editing. If I’m not editing, I’m sharing—sending flares from my lighthouse so readers can find the shore I’ve drawn by hand. The work doesn’t pause when inspiration does. The tide moves with or without me, and the only way to get anywhere is to put an oar in the water every day, even when the fog is thick.

In AR, everything means more than it looks. A mug of coffee stops being a mug. Steam rolls out like sea fog over the harbor city I sketched in a January notebook—the one with crooked alleys and market bells and a lighthouse whose stair treads know my footsteps by now. The keyboard isn’t plastic and wires; it’s a compass that points toward scenes I haven’t met and scenes I’m avoiding. The cursor blinks like a beacon: here, here, here. Come back to work.

Characters are the first to step through. They don’t knock; they appear mid-argument, mid-laugh, mid-betrayal, dragging weather from their world into mine. A woman with ink-stained fingers and a secret she thinks is hers to keep sits across a table I’ve never owned, tapping out a rhythm that nags me until I write it. A courier with a map stitched into his jacket refuses to sleep until I let him miss his train. They bring me their trouble and their hope and ask me to be brave enough to tell the truth about both.

Writing is the first excavation. It’s the rush of discovering a bone in the sand and imagining the whole animal in a heartbeat. Then comes editing—the archaeology that happens with a brush instead of a shovel. Line by line, brush, brush, brush. I dig out the clean edges of the story from the clay of my habits. I cut the clever lines that don’t serve the skeleton. I sand away the splinters of scenes that snag but don’t support.

Editing is humbling. It asks: if you were a reader with a train to catch and twenty minutes to spare, would you keep turning pages? It makes you honest. It makes you protective of the reader’s time like it’s your own. It teaches you that your favorite sentence is sometimes the one that has to go.

Then there’s the sharing. I used to call it marketing and feel like I’d swapped my compass for a billboard, but that was before I understood it as lighthouse work. A story without a reader is a ship locked in the bottle: complete, exquisite, invisible. So I keep the glass polished. I write the note that says, “This is the world waiting inside,” and I send it in a thousand bottles. I accept that some will wash back to my own feet. I light the lamp again tomorrow. Maintenance isn’t glamorous, but neither is missing land because the light went out.

What did I trade for this? The easy glow of someone else’s story. The comfort of predictable arcs and neat resolutions. I traded hours that evaporated into hours that accrue. The time I used to float became time I build.

Not all trades feel noble. There are nights when the couch calls me by name, when the news scrolls like a slow-motion car wreck and every good show has three seasons ready to swallow me whole. There are mornings when the alarm sounds like a dare. I don’t always win. But I keep a little ledger—a trade log that tells me, honestly, what I gave up and what I made instead.

Gave up: an hour of television, a mindless scroll, a snack I didn’t need. Built instead: 827 words that moved a character from lying to telling the truth. Reshaped a chapter so the secret doesn’t leak too soon. Jotted a note about how the lighthouse uses a lens I’d never heard of before—Fresnel, a word that tastes like a bell.

Some nights the ledger holds only this: showed up. Sat with the blank and did not run. That counts. That’s a bead on the string.

Is it worth it? I don’t pretend I don’t miss the weightless time. Ease is its own kind of bliss. But there’s another kind: the exhale that comes when a paragraph clicks into place after a week of sanding. The email that says, “I brought your character to the doctor with me; she kept me company in the waiting room.” The message that says, “I didn’t think anyone knew how this felt until I read your chapter.” Those are the moments when the ledger pays interest.

Author Reality is not glamorous. It’s not a montage scored to moody piano. It’s a series of ordinary choices that turn into extraordinary pages. It is the practice of saying no to something pleasant so you can say yes to something that will outlast you. It’s a room you have to reenter every day because the door locks when you leave. And it is, somehow, always worth the key.

Maybe you feel the familiar itch in your palms. The tug toward building instead of consuming. The quiet knowing that you are meant to make something you cannot yet see the edges of. If that’s you, come with me. We can navigate together, even in different boats.

Here’s how to open your AR door:

For one week, switch off the one-eyed monster. Thirty minutes a day is enough to crack the seam between here and there. Put your remote in a drawer, set a timer, and let silence stretch long enough to get uncomfortable. On the other side of discomfort is a voice that wants to talk to you.

Choose your role each day so you don’t fight your own weather. Calm sea? Write new words, even if they’re ugly. Wind picking up? Edit yesterday’s draft with gentle eyes. Fog horn blowing? Share a piece—a paragraph, a line, a feeling—with someone who might need it. Writing, editing, sharing. Every day has a job.

Keep a tiny trade log. One line. What you traded. What you built. Gave up: 40 minutes of scrolling. Built: 3 new pages and a better scene transition. Gave up: a second helping of dessert. Built: the energy to reread my own work without hating it. The log is proof. The log is a map.

Offer a postcard from your AR. A sentence, a sketch of a character, a logline that scares you a little to say out loud. Tell me why it matters to you. We anchor each other when we speak our worlds into air.

You don’t need a headset to live in augmented reality. You need intention. You need a door you’re willing to close and a light you’re willing to switch on. You need the courage to choose your story over the millions that want to borrow your attention for free and charge you with regret later.

I won’t pretend it’s easy to keep that light burning. But I can promise this: the worlds we build in AR have a way of building us back. They give us patience and precision and a tenderness for our own imperfect drafts. They teach us to wait for the fog to lift and to move forward anyway, even when it doesn’t. They send back echoes in the shape of readers who bring our characters to breakfast, to chemotherapy, to bed. They make meaning out of minutes.

The light is on. The keys are warm. The door is unlocked. If you’re ready, step into your AR. Leave your shoes at the threshold and carry only what you need: your stubbornness, your curiosity, a pen that doesn’t mind being chewed. I’ll be in the lighthouse, keeping watch, sending signals. When your boat appears on the horizon, I’ll wave you in.

We have worlds to make.

#WritersLife #BookTok #Bookstagram #WritingCommunity #AmWriting #IndieAuthor #WritersOfInstagram #AuthorTok #WritersOfTwitter #WritersOfX #Worldbuilding

The Blood Moon that Became Legend

The Blood Moon that Became Legend

Dear Readers, Do you love mysteries, eerie tales, and a touch of the inexplicable? Are you fascinated by stories that blur the line between reality and legend? Then I invite you to visit my entry in this weeks contest and dive into my latest short story, “The Blood Moon That Became Legend.”Set in the quiet town of Milford, Oregon, this story unravels a haunting chain of events that began with a blood moon, a 911 call, and strange lights in the woods. What followed were footprints too large to be human, a mutilated cow, and a town spiraling into fear and speculation. Is it all an elaborate prank, or is something far more sinister at play?I’d love to hear your thoughts! Drop by my site, read the story, and share your comments. Let me know what you think of the tale—your feedback is invaluable as I continue crafting more thrilling narratives.Visit my site here: [Insert your site link]Step into the mystery of Milford. The blood moon awaits you.

The goal was to tell a story in the form of a police report, news article, or journal entry about an incredible (or impossible) event.

When the blood moon rises over the quiet town of Milford, Oregon, the line between prank and peril blurs. A teenager’s terrified 911 call sparks a cascade of strange events: eerie lights, bone-chilling screams, massive clawed footprints, and a mutilated cow. What begins as a suspected hoax unravels into a mystery that shakes the town to its core. With rumors of cryptids, unexplained disappearances, and sinister motives swirling, young Jamie Carter takes it upon herself to uncover the truth. But as the blood moon’s glow fades, Milford faces a chilling question: what if the legend is real?

Dark, suspenseful, and laced with cosmic unease, The Blood Moon That Became Legend will leave you questioning what lurks in the shadows—and whether some mysteries are better left unsolved.

Ya’ll check out the story on the Reedsy site and give it a like for me. https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/scott-taylor-918071/

Thanks

Rethinking Blame: Kirk and Carlson’s Conversation Unpacked

Rethinking Blame: Kirk and Carlson’s Conversation Unpacked

The recent interview between Charlie Kirk and Tucker Carlson warrants closer scrutiny, particularly in light of the significant influence both figures wield in shaping public discourse. While the conversation touched on a variety of topics, including generational blame, political strategy, and cultural values, it also revealed certain rhetorical tendencies and ideological positions that merit critical reflection and, perhaps, a reevaluation of their approach.


Generational Blame and Oversimplification

One of the central themes of the interview was the critique of Baby Boomers, with both Kirk and Carlson suggesting that this generation bears significant responsibility for the economic and cultural challenges faced by younger generations, particularly Gen Z. This argument, while provocative, risks oversimplifying complex systemic issues. As noted in the transcript of the interview titled “How Debt Has Radicalized Young America and Why Boomers Deserve the Blame”, Kirk and Carlson discuss how debt and economic inequality have disproportionately impacted younger generations, framing Boomers as a primary cause 

.While it is true that certain policies and decisions made during the Baby Boomer era have contributed to current economic challenges, attributing blame to an entire generation ignores the diversity within that cohort. Many Boomers were not in positions of power and faced their own economic struggles. Furthermore, systemic issues such as rising debt, economic inequality, and environmental degradation are the result of decisions made by individuals across multiple generations, not solely by Boomers. This kind of generational scapegoating risks alienating potential allies and oversimplifying the root causes of these problems.


Inflammatory Rhetoric and Its Consequences

Another point of concern is the tone and language used during the interview. Tucker Carlson, known for his provocative style, reportedly used inflammatory language, including a call to “lock those [expletive] up,” which was met with visible discomfort from Kirk, as noted in the interview. While Carlson’s rhetoric may resonate with certain segments of his audience, it raises questions about the broader implications of such language in public discourse.Inflammatory rhetoric, while effective in capturing attention, can undermine constructive dialogue and alienate individuals who might otherwise engage with the issues being discussed. It also risks reinforcing the very dynamics of power and division that Carlson and Kirk often critique. As public figures with significant platforms, both men have a responsibility to foster thoughtful and inclusive conversations rather than resorting to language that exacerbates polarization.


The Role of Self-Reflection in Public Discourse

Given the influence of both Carlson and Kirk, it is crucial for them to engage in self-reflection and consider the broader impact of their messaging. While their critiques of cultural and political elites often resonate with audiences who feel disillusioned or marginalized, they must also ensure that their arguments are grounded in nuance and avoid perpetuating division. For instance, Carlson’s reflections on religion and values, as highlighted in the interview, offer an opportunity to emphasize unity and shared purpose rather than focusing on blame or conflict.Moreover, Kirk’s role as a voice for younger generations could benefit from a more balanced approach that acknowledges the contributions and struggles of older generations while advocating for systemic change. By fostering intergenerational collaboration and emphasizing shared goals, Kirk and Carlson could help bridge divides rather than deepen them.


The recent interview between Charlie Kirk and Tucker Carlson provides a valuable opportunity to reflect on the role of public figures in shaping societal narratives. While their critiques of generational and systemic issues raise important questions, their reliance on oversimplification and inflammatory rhetoric risks undermining the constructive potential of their platform. A more nuanced and inclusive approach, grounded in self-reflection and a commitment to fostering unity, would better serve their audience and contribute to meaningful progress on the issues they seek to address.

Avoid Marketing Mistakes: Tips for Authors

Avoid Marketing Mistakes: Tips for Authors


When you flush money down the shitter expecting results, you’re not just throwing a party for your dignity—you’re throwing it a surprise funeral. Spoiler alert: the porcelain throne isn’t some magical fountain of success. It’s not going to spit out gold bars or a winning lottery ticket. No, it’s just a glorified trash can for bad decisions and the aftermath of your Taco Bell binge. And let’s be real, the only thing you’re going to find in there is regret, a questionable smell, and the faint echo of your own stupidity.
Seriously, what were you expecting? A genie to pop out and grant you three wishes? Hate to break it to you, but the only thing coming out of that toilet is the ghost of last night’s tequila and the shattered remains of your self-esteem. Congratulations, you’ve officially turned your bathroom into a shrine for poor life choices. Light a candle. Say a prayer. And for the love of God, stop flushing your hopes and dreams down the crapper.


So, my book, Stupid Shit: A Survival Guide for a World Gone Mad, is almost ready to drop, and now it’s time to tackle the beast that is marketing. And let’s be honest—marketing can feel like trying to sell ice to penguins while wearing a clown suit. But hey, if you’re writing a book about stupid shit, you’re already halfway to genius. The trick is to avoid doing stupid shit while marketing your book. I know people who’ve written books, slapped them on Amazon, and then sat back waiting for the million-dollar checks to roll in. Should we tell them? Or just let them keep refreshing their bank accounts in blissful ignorance?

Then there are the people who pay someone else to do their marketing for them. Because nothing screams “I’m invested in my book” like outsourcing the entire process to someone who couldn’t give two shits if your book sells or ends up as a coaster for their coffee mug. Let’s be real—these people don’t care about your literary masterpiece on why Rome really fell. They’re not sitting there thinking, “Wow, this author’s insights into ancient history are going to change the world!” No, they’re thinking, “How fast can I slap together a half-assed Facebook ad and still charge them $500?”
If you’re going to be an author, you’ve got to face the cold, hard truth: unless you’ve got the luck of the Irish, or 50 shades of luck in the form of a billionaire with a fetish for spanking young women with tender white bottoms, you’re going to have to work a little harder. And no, I don’t mean “harder” in the Christian Grey sense. I mean you’re going to have to dive headfirst into the murky, soul-sucking waters of marketing your own damn book.


Because here’s the thing: no one is coming to save you. There’s no knight in shining armor galloping in on a horse made of Amazon algorithms to rescue your sales. You’re not Anastasia Steele, and your book isn’t going to magically seduce the masses just by existing. You’ve got to put in the work. You’ve got to convince people that your book is worth their time, their money, and their precious attention span, which, let’s be honest, is shorter than a TikTok video these days.


So, unless you’re sitting on a pile of cash and a dream that some marketing guru is going to turn your novel into the next Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s time to roll up your sleeves and get to work. Because the only thing worse than writing a book no one reads is paying someone else to pretend they care about it while they’re secretly Googling “how to make passive income without trying.”


Many people get on Twitter or Facebook and do what…Spam.
You know that guy who sends 16 identical pitches to random blogs in five hours? Yeah, don’t be that guy. Spamming your book everywhere is like farting in an elevator—it’s loud, obnoxious, and everyone hates you for it. Instead, focus on connecting with your actual audience. Who are they? People who love sarcasm, humor, and a healthy dose of WTF moments. Speak to them directly, not to the void. The void doesn’t buy books. The void doesn’t even have a credit card.
Learn from the Snowqueen’s Icedragon (Yes, That’s a Real Thing)


Let’s take a moment to appreciate E.L. James, the queen of turning fan fiction into a global phenomenon. Back in 2009, she wrote Fifty Shades of Grey as Twilight fan fiction under the pseudonym “Snowqueen’s Icedragon.” (Yes, really. Let that sink in.) She posted it on fanfiction.net, where she tapped into an existing fanbase of people who were already thirsty for sparkly vampires and awkward romance. Genius, right? She then moved her story to her own website, self-published it, and let word-of-mouth do the heavy lifting. By the time Hollywood came knocking, she was already rolling in cash and probably laughing maniacally while swimming in a pool of royalty checks. Moral of the story? Know your audience, and don’t be afraid to embrace the absurd.


Know Your Audience (Hint: It’s Not Karen from Accounting)
If you’re marketing your book to “everyone,” you’re marketing it to no one. Your book isn’t for everyone—In my case my audience is people who appreciate humor, sarcasm, and the absurdity of modern life.

Who is yours? Lean into that. Your ideal reader isn’t Karen from accounting who spends her weekends manifesting her dream life with crystals and self-help books.

My reader is the person who laughs at fart jokes, wonders why the world is so damn ridiculous, and probably has a meme folder labeled “For When I Lose Faith in Humanity.”
Social Media: Stop Screaming “BUY MY BOOK” Like a Lunatic.


If your social media strategy is just “BUY MY BOOK” on repeat, you’re doing it wrong. Social media is like a party—if you’re the guy standing in the corner shouting about your book, people will avoid you like you’ve got the plague. Instead, In my case I will share funny anecdotes, behind-the-scenes moments, or even snippets of the book.


The world is too damned serious and I want to make people laugh, make them think, and then—then—tell them about my book.


Balance is key. Think of it like foreplay. You don’t just dive in screaming, “BUY MY BOOK!” You warm them up first. Buy them dinner. Tell them a joke. Then hit them with the sales pitch.
Start Marketing Before You’re Ready (Because You’ll Never Be Ready)


Waiting until your book is out to start marketing is like showing up to a potluck with an empty plate. Start building hype now. Share your writing process, tease your cover design, or post about the stupid shit that inspired your book. The earlier you start connecting with your audience, the more invested they’ll be when your book drops. And remember, it’s not about follower counts or newsletter subscribers—it’s about quality over quantity. A small, engaged audience is worth more than a million bots or disinterested followers. Treat your audience like gold. Or at least like a really good burrito. Both are precious.


I know way too many authors who don’t give a shit—or even two fucks—about their audience. And let me tell you, folks, that ain’t gonna fly. Your audience isn’t just some faceless blob of people who magically buy your book because you exist. They’re your peeps. Your tribe. The people who are willing to spend their hard-earned cash on your ramblings about why Rome really fell or whatever other nonsense you’ve decided to write about. If you treat them like a pot pie you left in the air fryer too long—burnt, forgotten, and stinking up the place—they’re going to do what any self-respecting human would do: set off the fire alarm, leave your ass hungry, and never come back.


Here’s the thing: your audience is the lifeblood of your book. Without them, you’re just some weirdo shouting into the void. And the void doesn’t buy books. The void doesn’t leave reviews. The void doesn’t even care that you exist. So, if you’re not willing to put in the effort to connect with your readers, you might as well pack it up now and save yourself the embarrassment of watching your Amazon ranking plummet faster than your self-esteem after reading a one-star review.


Treat Your Audience Like Gold (Not Like That Mystery Meat in the Back of Your Freezer)
Your audience isn’t stupid. They can tell when you’re phoning it in. If you’re just throwing your book out there and hoping for the best, they’ll notice. And they’ll leave. Fast. Think of your audience like a delicate soufflé—you’ve got to nurture them, pay attention to them, and for the love of God, don’t slam the oven door by ignoring their needs. Otherwise, they’ll collapse into a sad, deflated mess, and you’ll be left wondering why no one’s buying your book.


So, how do you keep your audience happy? Simple: give a shit. Engage with them. Talk to them. Make them feel like they’re part of something special. Because if you don’t, they’ll find someone else who will. And trust me, there’s no shortage of authors out there who are more than happy to steal your readers while you’re busy treating them like yesterday’s leftovers.


Don’t Be That Author Who Thinks They’re Too Cool for Their Readers


You know the type. The author who thinks they’re some literary god, too busy basking in their own brilliance to bother with the people who actually read their work. Newsflash: you’re not Hemingway. And even if you were, Hemingway would probably tell you to stop being such a pretentious asshole and buy your readers a drink. Your audience doesn’t owe you anything. They don’t have to read your book. They don’t have to leave you glowing reviews. And they sure as hell don’t have to stick around if you treat them like crap.


So, here’s the deal: if you want your audience to care about you, you’ve got to care about them first. Show them some love. Make them laugh. Give them a reason to stick around. Because at the end of the day, your audience isn’t just a bunch of random assholes—they’re the reason your book exists. Treat them like it.


Don’t Be Afraid to Be Bold (Or a Little Stupid)
My book is called Stupid Shit, so you better believe I’m going all-in on audacious marketing. Humor, sarcasm, and a touch of absurdity to grab attention. Because let’s face it, the world is already full of stupid shit—my book is here to make sense of it. Or at least laugh at it.


Marketing doesn’t have to be a soul-sucking exercise in futility. It can actually be fun. Just remember: don’t spam, don’t rely on bots, and don’t try to be everything to everyone. Focus on your audience, be genuine, and let your personality shine through. After all, the world is already drowning in stupid shit—my book is here to be the life raft. Or at least the inflatable pool noodle.
Sign up for e-mails, subscribe, you know the drill.

I have to get back to work on editing 1300 Feet Per Second which is a thriller.
Next time we visit I will share my writing techniques regarding letting sleeping dogs nap while I work on something else and then return to wake them up and get them howling.
-Best

Who Are You? (The Sarcastic, No-BS Edition)

Who Are You? (The Sarcastic, No-BS Edition)

Let me tell you who I am. I’m the person who spent years in the corporate trenches, leading teams of programmers and professionals, trying to convince them that being themselves wasn’t just some cheesy motivational poster bullshit. You know the one: “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.” Yeah, that. Except I actually meant it. I told my people to embrace who they were—quirks, flaws, and all—because pretending to be someone else is exhausting. And frankly, most people suck at it anyway.

But here’s the kicker: in today’s world, being yourself is practically a revolutionary act. Why? Because half the country is too busy being spoon-fed propaganda by the fake news machine to even remember who they are. They’re like zombies, but instead of brains, they’re after the next trending hashtag. And don’t even get me started on the other half—they’re too busy arguing with the first half to notice they’re just as lost. It’s a circus, and everyone’s the clown.

In my upcoming book, Stupid Shit (yes, that’s the title, and no, I’m not changing it), I dive into the absurdity of it all. I’ll teach you how to spot the tricks, the traps, and the outright stupidity that keeps people from living authentically. Spoiler alert: it’s everywhere. But hey, at least it’s entertaining.

Why Be Who You Are (Even When Everyone Else Thinks You’re an Idiot)?

Let’s get real for a second. Being yourself is hard. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows and inspirational Instagram quotes. Sometimes, it’s more like standing in the middle of a storm, holding a lightning rod, while everyone around you screams, “Why can’t you just be normal?” But here’s the thing: being yourself is the only way to live a life that doesn’t make you want to punch a wall every morning.

Let me break it down for you:

1. Living Authentically Brings Fulfillment (And Fewer Headaches)

Pretending to be someone you’re not is like wearing a pair of shoes that are two sizes too small. Sure, you might look good for a minute, but eventually, your feet are going to bleed. Living authentically means you stop giving a shit about what other people think and start doing what actually makes you happy. And no, I’m not talking about the kind of “happy” that comes from binge-watching Netflix while eating an entire pizza. I mean the deep, soul-level kind of happy. The kind that makes you wake up and think, “Yeah, I’m killing it.”

2. External Validation Is a Scam (Stop Chasing It)

Here’s a fun fact: no matter how hard you try, you’re never going to make everyone like you. Why? Because people are fickle, judgmental, and often just plain wrong. Chasing their approval is like trying to win a game of Monopoly with no money and no properties—it’s not going to happen, and you’ll just end up flipping the board in frustration. Carl Jung said it best: “The world will ask who you are, and if you don’t know, the world will tell you.” And trust me, the world’s version of you is probably boring as hell.

3. Fake People Attract Fake Friends (And Who Needs That?)

When you’re not being yourself, you attract people who like the fake version of you. And guess what? Those relationships are about as deep as a kiddie pool. When you’re authentic, you attract people who actually like you—flaws, quirks, and all. Sure, it might take longer to find your tribe, but when you do, it’s worth it. Plus, you won’t have to pretend to like pumpkin spice lattes just to fit in. (Unless you actually like them, in which case, carry on.)

4. Your Weirdness Is Your Superpower (Embrace It)

Newsflash: the things that make you different are the things that make you awesome. Trying to fit into someone else’s mold is like trying to shove a square peg into a round hole—it’s awkward, painful, and completely unnecessary. So, you’re a little weird? Good. The world needs more weird. Normal is overrated, and frankly, it’s boring as hell.

5. Rejection Is Inevitable (So You Might as Well Be Yourself)

Here’s the harsh truth: not everyone is going to like you. Some people will think you’re too loud, too quiet, too weird, too whatever. And you know what? That’s fine. Because the people who reject you for being yourself are doing you a favor, they’re clearing the way for the people who actually matter—the ones who will love you for exactly who you are. So, let them go. Bye, Felicia.

At the end of the day, being yourself isn’t just about living authentically—it’s about living without regrets. It’s about looking back on your life and thinking, “Yeah, I did it my way,” instead of, “Why the hell did I spend so much time trying to impress people I don’t even like?” So, stop worrying about what everyone else thinks. Stop trying to fit in. And for the love of all that is holy, stop pretending to like kale. Just be you. The world might not always appreciate it, but trust me, your sanity will.

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-Best