Open letter to:  Free the #Nipple…

Open letter to:  Free the #Nipple…

This subject matter had me chuckling when I was asked about it, until I listened to the point that she was trying to make.

One of my favorite news anchors was on Red Eye one night with Greg Gutfeld where she was wearing a dress that was kind of revealing. I am certain that she was taped into the dress but as they were heckling her a little bit “in fun of course” she proffered her thoughts on breasts.  “Breasts were made for three things: to get a man, to feed babies and prove that gravity works!” The person who said that was Patty Ann Browne who at one time had the 4:30pm spot on Fox news.  She has a bubbly personality and just someone who is a pleasure to listen to, and of course, very easy on the eyes; skimpy dress or not.

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The free the nipple campaign is being promoted by some who see no difference between the male nipple and the female nipple.  Is there a difference?

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The pro side of the debate hinges on the anatomical configuration of the male chest and the female chest.  Indeed some obese men have more breast tissue than some women and the anatomical configuration would appear about the same.

If men did not have hair on their chest and were slightly obese one could make the argument that their chests are no different from that of a women.

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Here is the rub…  Men are hardwired to respond in a sexual manner to such things as breast, butts, legs, and just about every part of the female.  Indeed, our programming is such that we are aroused visually by ladies and lady parts.

If you could look at things pragmatically, there is absolutely no reason that lady parts should have that affect on man, when you boil it down there is nothing attractive about them at all, period.  My guess is that the people making this argument are looking at things pragmatically and thus don’t see the problem.

The attraction should be to the person, and not some part of them made for procreation.

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As I stated in another post, when a man sees a lady in a bikini, where do the eyes go first?  They go to the spots that are covered by the cloth.  The hell of it is that, once they go there, the mind takes to filling in the blanks as it were, trying to complete the picture.

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You have no doubt seen programs on TV where a woman will be talking with a guy and have to tell him that her eyes are up here, not in her blouse.  While men are visual creatures, going past their programming in this day and age is really part of being mature, much less, enlightened.   There is no excuse for that type of behavior in today’s society. Having said that; it happens!   I was no different as a teen, and I did not know why!  I just knew that cleavage was wonderful! I knew that the silhouette of a woman through a light fabric was a vision to behold, I did not know why however.  I knew that playboy was a gift of grandeur, but to be fair, back in my day they had just stopped putting clover leaves over the nipples; and anything else was just not there.

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Some women, to be fair, dress in a provocative manner to elicit that type of response, or to get attention, or call attention to their “assets.”

Rihanna

Speaking as someone who has been there, training of ones “program” takes a conscious effort.  As some of us “men” try to evolve past our programming, we have people like Kim Kardashian posing nude.  We have Skinamax and more smut on TV than ever before.  We have so much porn on the internet that it is hard to not run into it.

Attractive women in sales positions get into to see more clients than their male counterparts.  Most pharmaceutical reps that I have seen in 15 years of working in the hospitals were female, and attractive.  They got in to see the doctor where the male counterpart spent more time in the lobby or waiting room.  It would be interesting to pull statistics from the two to see which sex sold the most.  Attractive women working at restaurants showing a little cleavage and being a little flirtatious garner larger tips than their male counterparts.  Hooters and similar venue restaurants hire girls that are willing to dawn the skimpy outfit and play the part.  The food is more expensive and still they do well and the girls get good tips.  There are differences within the sexes and some of them are negative and some positive.  So are all men pigs who frequent those places?  Some women would say “YES” and some would be a little more forgiving and say no.

Pornography is rampant and let’s face it “sex sells.”  Playboy is the industry it is today because of this visual media.  If men were not turned on by looking at nude models, it would be like many other magazines, read for the articles and not for the centerfold.

When I was a young guy I thought the ideal job would be to be a photographer for Playboy.  Boy am I glad that I did not pursue that.  I did weddings for a while and I left that as well.  Bridzilla’s suck!

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When photography was first invented taking nude pictures of women was top of the list.  The same is true for motion picture.  Skin flicks were a large industry, even though it was illegal.  Man’s programming is such that even though we can “know” everything about it, we still look.

Today in this age the adult film industry is in the billions on revenue.  It was roughly $13 billion in 2006.

In 2008 there were over 41K websites that distributed porn.  Of the free websites most of them were simply used as bait to get you to go to a pay web site.

Over 90% of pay porn sites buy their material instead of creating it themselves.

While this letter is not about the porn industry, my point to include a few stats is that visual stimulation of mostly men, is a huge industry and the folks that ban the nipple probably don’t want to promote pornography, even though most people with a brain know the difference between the two. In the bible belt I would guess that nude and pornography are the same thing as far as they are concerned.

Topless

The Free the Nipple campaign was popularized by Scout Willis, Bruce Willis’s and Demi Moors’ daughter.  She went walking around Manahatten half naked to bring attention to the campaign.  It is evidently legal there. Her goal was to bring to the forefront this unequal right of a man and a woman to go shirtless.

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As an intellectual exercise let’s think about this.

If I wanted to make this campaign successful; how would I do it?

First I would need to change public opinion.

The LGBT community has taken an in your face approach which just pisses people off.  If you want people to buy in, that is not the way that I would go about it.

There would have to be a strong differentiation between nudity and pornography.

The folks that would be for it:  would be some very liberal women, and I suspect most college kids as most of them are certainly more liberal than those of us with some age on us.

Support for them might also come from men who A: liked to look at breasts and B: men who are evolved enough to recognize that there is indeed a legal disparity.

Against: conservative religious groups comprising of women and men.

Overtly conservative people of no religious conviction but their upbringing may have had religious ties.

The “for” group is easy to figure out, the “against” is a little more complex.

1 Timothy 2:9

9Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, 10but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness. 11A woman must quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness.…

I think that this is the verse that probably would most likely be used as against it.  However; looking at this in context, Paul is talking here about wives, not women in general, and I think he is really addressing the roles of wives with their husbands.

I also think that “religious folk” would find the “free the nipple campaign” to be incongruent with their teachings and beliefs, and might even equate this with the work of the devil.

I maintain that clothes were born out of necessity to protect one from the elements and not from modesty. Modesty is most likely a byproduct of wearing clothes.

If a poll were taken, I would guess that it would be about 30% give or take, of the country might be for it, so here is my advice.

It is no surprise that there are parts of the country that are more liberal than others and there is also no surprise that there are places where this type of “dress” would be more acceptable than others, downtown Manhattan or, downtown anywhere for that matter; not so much, for either of the sexes.

Some examples of places might be a beach or community that is set aside for public nudity, certainly.  Your own house or fenced back yard, certainly. Communities that are actually set aside for naturist “buy naked” type places.

Pick your battles:

Blue states and blue counties is where I would go first.  By blue I mean democratic leaning states and counties.  Once you get a foothold in some of those places the idea will spread as this is not a really a political football but democrats seem to be more open to things such as this.  Men more than women will most likely be your allies as men are more open to naturism than women. (in my experience)

I would like to see those folks organize their thoughts and efforts on getting states, cities and towns to set aside areas where public nudity is ok.  There are some places in a few states but, not everyone can travel to another state or country just to be free of the encumbrances of clothing.

It is more than just “free the nipple” however; that really needs to be taken into account.  There is a subset of humanity that is in every country, that is not hung up on clothing, and who feel that nudity is nothing more than a lifestyle.  Who are we to impose our beliefs or likes or dislikes unilaterally on everyone?

There are beaches all around this country and others where it is technically illegal; but the law looks the other way where breasts are concerned.  I would imagine if folks complained, something would have to be done.  There need to be beaches where fair warning is given by posting, and this is legal.  Naturist or just those that want to go topless should not have to break the law in order to do it.

Clothing Optional Beach Sign

Truly, there are some who can look at another human being without clothing and not become erotically aroused.   There are some who cannot, referencing those that cannot get past a woman’s breast and look her in the eyes.  It is those that need to stay away from such areas and it is that reason why public nudity cannot just exist everywhere.

Some folks have issues with this and it is for that reason that it would be unfair to just allow public nudity everywhere, at this time.

Much like an alcoholic should not go into places that sell or have booze, one who has issues with sex should stay away from “public boobs!”  They should have a safe haven just as those that want to be shirtless or clothing less should also have a safe haven.

The free the nipple folks need to focus their efforts on goals that are obtainable and not on some goal that will never happen.  By gaining ground with public places for this type of lifestyle, mankind can protect those that do not want to see it, or cannot handle it, while allowing those that want that lifestyle to be free to live as they choose.

Other countries have parks and such were naturism is perfectly ok. We as America need to unshackle our puritan prudishness and not try to impose those ideals on them.  We are a global community in many respects and joining our brethren on simple things like this where no one is injured is…well….past due!

I am actually pleased to see that shows like “naked and afraid” and “buying naked” are gaining popularity.  I actually think this is a good start to get prudish people aware that they are not the center of the universe but; if they want to wear a Burka or some sort of frock that hides their skin from view, they too have that right. Not many years ago there were police that stayed on the beach with their sole purpose to measure the length of the woman’s bathing costume to make certain that it met with puritan ideals.  Folks, women can smoke although they should not, they vote and if they want things to change they need to, and; they don’t have to wear a bra!  Get over it!

I can’t help but think that “body shaming,” in large part plays a roll in folks thinking ill of this type of thing.

As an artist I study the human body from the inside out.  There is beauty in the Skelton, the muscles, and all things that make it what it is. Having spent time in many hospitals and on many beaches, I have seen all types of bodies “from the inside out” as well as the people who are on the beach in bathing costumes who are definitely out of shape. They are still beautiful.   We all have warts or strange shapes and sizes, and lopsided this or that and if you get hung up on that, your prejudices could color your opinion of whether it should be allowed at all.

I was once invited to a nudist colony, years ago.  I remember telling the person that I happen to think that most folks look better with their clothing on.  It was not about looks however; and years later I discovered that.  It is indeed about freedom to literally be as you are.  No judgment.  It is about Feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin and be around others in a like situation without the sexual overtones or the judgment of others as they too are in this same situation.

There was this one man I will never forget; He was way out of shape, wearing a Speedo if I remember right.  He had a scar from his neck, around his belly button down to his waste and down his leg.  This was a large man!

He was walking on the beach, just like I was, and I smiled when I saw him and thought to myself, “good for you!”

If a Speedo makes you feel sexy, than have at it!  Who am I to judge anyone?   Once you don’t have clothes to hide behind ,you kind of show “yourself” and not just your skin but the person who you really are.  Those around you do as well and that makes for an interesting day.

Are there people who would be mean and think or say ugly things, you bet!  Allowing the opinions of others to affect how you feel about yourself is not a good idea.  If people hurt you with their words, you are in fact allowing it by giving them that power.

Once you know yourself, you take away that power from anyone, as you know who you are, and what you are, and no matter what, you are beautiful.

While the “free the nipple campaign” is about women being lawfully permitted to walk around as men do, without shirts, I think both sexes can learn something from this.  I really need some female input here as I think females might also be stimulated sexually by visual stimuli and just maybe, some half naked guy walking around with the “6 pack” might arouse them, and encourage them to be inappropriate.

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Maybe, just maybe… that is why we hear of 24 year old female teachers having sex with 16 year old boys.  Maybe, just maybe…. we should not be talking about freeing the nipple but covering up the nipples of both men and women… Thoughts?

Summarize here: Organize your efforts by state, city etc and push for places where this type of activity can be made lawful.  Start small and in some of the places that are the easiest, like a small snowball going down hill one success will breed others.  If this is really important, don’t bite off too much at one time.  Pick a state, get to know your city counsel folks and garner public support from that community.  While free the nipple is catchy, and that may be all you need, I might consider finding another more politically correct phrase, which would garner support from more than just a few.   I might actually get in touch with a PR firm and pick their brain.

I don’t know how many people out there would support this; so that might be a good first step.  How large is your base?  To get support from the naturist associations would be a good first step if you have not already done so.  Unlike the LGBT community with their in your face approach you do not want to trample on anyone.  A truculent style of persuasion will get you nowhere! If you want to be respected, you must first respect.

So to my friend that asked me about this, here are my thoughts after much consideration and soul searching.  I hope that you find some of them useful!  As always I welcome friendly conversation, debate and forwards…

-Best

Copyright 2014 TimeDok, All rights reserved.

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3 thoughts on “Open letter to:  Free the #Nipple…

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