Tag: nipple

Open letter to GoTopless.org

Open letter to GoTopless.org

Warning:  The following blog contains pictures from the go topless demonstration in New York Today.  Some of these shots “that were taken by other people and posted publicly” contain (nipples.)

You were warned….   🙂

As stated in my letter to “free the nipple,” there are real issues with public nudity.

While I agree that there is a time and a place for everything; I feel that a truculent style of forcing your “agenda,” detracts from the message.

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  • Why do some women want to go around topless?
  • Is it really an equal rights thing?
  • Is this an attack on men?

Most men like nipples ladies and I have to tell you that if the laws were only left to men to make, they would be very generous to any lady that wanted to walk around half nude!

I give the respect that I am accorded.

When you choose to dis-respect a segment of the population; you don’t win over very many of them.

I get it, you got publicity and you made the news.  Now people like me are spending their time pontificating on the merits of your cause, and how best to solve the issues.

I don't get the pink mask.
I don’t get the pink mask.

As I stated in my letter to “free the nipple,men are visually stimulated.  (I must admit that nothing in the picture above stimulated me what-so-ever-!) That is the way that we either evolved, or God made us pick your choice; those are the facts!  When you expose yourself, you set hormones and other endorphins into action.

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IMG_1144A whole host of things happens when we are sexually aroused and visual stimulation for men starts with hormones. 

What color eyes does she have?We call it behavior but, in reality, our actions may be partially driven by things out of our control.  Things happen automatically that we are not in control of. Chemicals are released which cause us to sweat, pupils dilate, adrenaline is released along with cortisol (the stress hormone) followed by Dopamine the “desire and reward hormone” then comes into play. We have serotonin that causes us to “think about a person” or in this case those “lovely breast,” several times a day!

The list goes on and folks, we are programmed for this action.  Had we not been such a puritanical society and ran around naked or “nude,” then I dare say that we would control our “urges much better.”

The argument to allow half-naked folks to run around cart-blanch anywhere should really be addressed by serious people who understand what they are asking.

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If you don’t think that what I am saying holds water, then tell me this, why is pornography such a huge issue today?!

Some Men and some women are lost in pornography. Where it used to be restricted by age and content, with the internet there is nothing held back.  I find it amazing that with each successive year, each and every magazine took pornography to new lows.

Much like drugs, pin-up girls no longer cut it.

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There is an interesting parallel to this and drugs because, if you think about it, both are chemical addictions.   With drugs, some of those same hormones are released as well as the action of the drug itself!

Some people cause themselves pain because, endorphins are released that like adrenalin; one can become addicted to them.

From the early days of Playboy, where clover leafs covered the nipples, and maybe a little flash of pubic hair to” gynecologists’ type shots” of inside the vagina or anus!  Who thinks that is sexy!?

Where are we headed as a society?

It is clear to me anyway, that you simply can’t just walk around naked, anywhere that you please.

For the same reason drunks who are “recovering,” don’t go where there is booze, people who have issues with porn, or sex addicts, don’t go to strip clubs.  It is not fair to everyone to allow you to parade around naked when or where you choose.

On the flip side of the coin, there should be places where such behavior is permitted with adequate signage depicting same.

The bottom line to this is really respect.  Ladies from a pragmatic look at things there is little difference in our anatomical makeup and for that, your argument is germane.

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Realistically, however; looking at the science involved and how we as humans are “driven;” you can certainly see that unfettered nudity would not work unless you forced the issue making everyone walk around naked!  I suspect that after an hour or so, the novelty would wear off and soon; breasts of men and women would look like any other part of them, and a stare would quickly turn into a passing glance, and then into not even noticing.

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Ok, I included a few bums for effect…you get the point. These folks are enjoying the outing and looking at the scenery and not staring at each other’s rude bits…

That is a part of human evolution that is simply not there in this country at this time.

Most people are way too hung up on their body, whether it be good or bad, and sexuality is right under the surface of most people’s thoughts.

With the Ashley Madison hack, it should have placed a light on what is going on with people of all walks of life.

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SEX SEX SEX!

It is not simply sex, as these folks have a wife or husband who they could have sex with.  It is different partners or sex with someone else.  WHY?

If we could put our differences aside, just let people be who and what they are and “get along” and, we were not thinking about, planning for, and working towards sex, just think about what we could accomplish as a people!

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Is it just me or does this thing appear phallic in nature….?

We are terribly un-evolved for the most part.  Those that want to “free the nipple,” I actually think might be more evolved than those that see this as some sort of taboo.  You can’t simply feel that it is wrong, you need to know “why it is wrong.”  These folks are pushing the envelope on social mores, that admittedly are out of date but…to what end?

If you go to a nudist resort, there will be people there who are probably more evolved than those that would condemn such a place just because.  Some will undoubtedly be there for the same reason that I thought about becoming a photographer for Playboy as a child.  The difference is, I grew up!

When we accept who and what we are, we can move past this truculent dialogue that persists in the world today. We are in fact sexual creatures that are geared for procreation, and that is why we do what we do, and think as we think.  That is why sex feels good, and hormones are released to drive us to seek partners to spread our seeds and subdue the earth.

That is why a high percentage of people will read this blog, over the others that I have posted which frankly are much more intelligent and enlightening than this, and many men will peruse the picture of the attractive redhead, longer than those with the pink mask over their faces!  Just know why you do what you do, and know who you are….

Life is about more than sex.  As a young person, I expect this and make allowances for this.  Spring break and other places where young people gather seem to be nothing more than a hormonally charged group of people oozing with testosterone and estrogen.   You hope that they make it through it, and hope that someone in the group is adult enough to govern the collective body, so people don’t get injured.

Spring Break 2016 Daytona
Spring Break 2016 Daytona

When you become “self-aware,” you learn to ask yourself why?

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“Why” is probably one of the most important questions that we learn to ask as a human being.  I do not discourage but encourage this.

  • Why do I like this?
  • Why do I hate this?
  • Why is this a good idea?
  • Why is this a bad idea?
  • Why did my parents tell me no?

Knowledge is powerful and, self-knowledge is one of the most powerful tools at your disposal!

I call this mirror time.  Who is that person in the mirror?

Before espousing your thoughts on a particular subject, know where your thoughts came from.

We as a nation have stopped thinking critically.  We act upon emotions which is just stupid. Emotions are one of the easiest ways that there is to manipulate you, and those that are in power; know this.

The Race card is played to divide people and it works because it is an emotionally charged issue.

If I can stir your emotions, I can control you!  The elite call these folks, “useful idiots!”  They can think for you by stirring your emotions, causing you to act without thinking!

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A movement based on a complete lie.  While there may be some issues with Police and people this movement which has been the flash-point of much violence and mayhem needs to stop.  

If you spend some time in the mirror guess what, they lose that power and you gain it.

Free the Nipple and Go Topless are saying the same thing.  Personally, I would not mind seeing everyone wear a shirt.  Let’s take this issue off the table, just wear a damned shirt!

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If you want to be naked in public, seek out nude beaches or nude resorts or clubs, or even cruises that cater to clothing optional events.  There are actually parks in Germany I think that are clothing optional.

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Americans are much more prudish than our European counterparts and I am certain that is a left over from the puritan start, this country had not that many years ago.  Don’t be disrespectful of them; if you want to be taken seriously, and respected.

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With the LGBT community, I have a thought that I would also like to espouse upon.

There are many places “spas” and such where people enter into an area and are expected to remove all of their clothes.  They are provided a “uniform” to wear in the common area but not before they are expected to shower and enjoy the wet area with other people who are also nude.

friends Justin Estill age 30 (blond) and Michael Ladagana age 34 of Astoria (dark hair) . Spa castle premier, saunas and pool. 115 East 57th Street Manhattan NY
friends Justin Estill age 30 (blond) and Michael Ladagana age 34 of Astoria (dark hair) . Spa castle premier, saunas, and pool. 115 East 57th Street Manhattan NY

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It is no secret that there are men who happen to be gay that go to these spas to watch other naked men shower and what have you.  Folks, that is simply creepy.

I know from reading, that some women do this as well, and then you have the folks who are Trans gendered, who identify as one sex or another.  What do they do?

In these “wet areas” not only are there adults but there are children, naked children who simply are playing in the water and having a good time.

I think that the laws need to be changed to protect children from let’s face it, pedophiles that might be lurking in the area.  As an adult, I can choose to go into one of these places knowing full well that there may be some deviant in there that enjoys watching others shower and what have you. 

I don’t believe that we have any business exposing children to possible creeps.

While I am on that subject, since gay folks knowingly go into these areas; how about a communal wet area that anyone can decide to use? 

It would be interesting to see how many people of different genders would actually take advantage of it.

Once again I have pontificated to the tune of right at 1700 words on a subject that should be rife with stimulating conversation.

As always, I appreciate comments, shares, re-blogs and of course stimulating conversation. Please keep your comments civil.  Thanks!

-Best

© All Rights Reserved 2015

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Open letter to:  Free the #Nipple…

Open letter to:  Free the #Nipple…

This subject matter had me chuckling when I was asked about it, until I listened to the point that she was trying to make.

One of my favorite news anchors was on Red Eye one night with Greg Gutfeld where she was wearing a dress that was kind of revealing. I am certain that she was taped into the dress but as they were heckling her a little bit “in fun of course” she proffered her thoughts on breasts.  “Breasts were made for three things: to get a man, to feed babies and prove that gravity works!” The person who said that was Patty Ann Browne who at one time had the 4:30pm spot on Fox news.  She has a bubbly personality and just someone who is a pleasure to listen to, and of course, very easy on the eyes; skimpy dress or not.

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The free the nipple campaign is being promoted by some who see no difference between the male nipple and the female nipple.  Is there a difference?

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The pro side of the debate hinges on the anatomical configuration of the male chest and the female chest.  Indeed some obese men have more breast tissue than some women and the anatomical configuration would appear about the same.

If men did not have hair on their chest and were slightly obese one could make the argument that their chests are no different from that of a women.

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Here is the rub…  Men are hardwired to respond in a sexual manner to such things as breast, butts, legs, and just about every part of the female.  Indeed, our programming is such that we are aroused visually by ladies and lady parts.

If you could look at things pragmatically, there is absolutely no reason that lady parts should have that affect on man, when you boil it down there is nothing attractive about them at all, period.  My guess is that the people making this argument are looking at things pragmatically and thus don’t see the problem.

The attraction should be to the person, and not some part of them made for procreation.

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As I stated in another post, when a man sees a lady in a bikini, where do the eyes go first?  They go to the spots that are covered by the cloth.  The hell of it is that, once they go there, the mind takes to filling in the blanks as it were, trying to complete the picture.

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You have no doubt seen programs on TV where a woman will be talking with a guy and have to tell him that her eyes are up here, not in her blouse.  While men are visual creatures, going past their programming in this day and age is really part of being mature, much less, enlightened.   There is no excuse for that type of behavior in today’s society. Having said that; it happens!   I was no different as a teen, and I did not know why!  I just knew that cleavage was wonderful! I knew that the silhouette of a woman through a light fabric was a vision to behold, I did not know why however.  I knew that playboy was a gift of grandeur, but to be fair, back in my day they had just stopped putting clover leaves over the nipples; and anything else was just not there.

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Some women, to be fair, dress in a provocative manner to elicit that type of response, or to get attention, or call attention to their “assets.”

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Speaking as someone who has been there, training of ones “program” takes a conscious effort.  As some of us “men” try to evolve past our programming, we have people like Kim Kardashian posing nude.  We have Skinamax and more smut on TV than ever before.  We have so much porn on the internet that it is hard to not run into it.

Attractive women in sales positions get into to see more clients than their male counterparts.  Most pharmaceutical reps that I have seen in 15 years of working in the hospitals were female, and attractive.  They got in to see the doctor where the male counterpart spent more time in the lobby or waiting room.  It would be interesting to pull statistics from the two to see which sex sold the most.  Attractive women working at restaurants showing a little cleavage and being a little flirtatious garner larger tips than their male counterparts.  Hooters and similar venue restaurants hire girls that are willing to dawn the skimpy outfit and play the part.  The food is more expensive and still they do well and the girls get good tips.  There are differences within the sexes and some of them are negative and some positive.  So are all men pigs who frequent those places?  Some women would say “YES” and some would be a little more forgiving and say no.

Pornography is rampant and let’s face it “sex sells.”  Playboy is the industry it is today because of this visual media.  If men were not turned on by looking at nude models, it would be like many other magazines, read for the articles and not for the centerfold.

When I was a young guy I thought the ideal job would be to be a photographer for Playboy.  Boy am I glad that I did not pursue that.  I did weddings for a while and I left that as well.  Bridzilla’s suck!

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When photography was first invented taking nude pictures of women was top of the list.  The same is true for motion picture.  Skin flicks were a large industry, even though it was illegal.  Man’s programming is such that even though we can “know” everything about it, we still look.

Today in this age the adult film industry is in the billions on revenue.  It was roughly $13 billion in 2006.

In 2008 there were over 41K websites that distributed porn.  Of the free websites most of them were simply used as bait to get you to go to a pay web site.

Over 90% of pay porn sites buy their material instead of creating it themselves.

While this letter is not about the porn industry, my point to include a few stats is that visual stimulation of mostly men, is a huge industry and the folks that ban the nipple probably don’t want to promote pornography, even though most people with a brain know the difference between the two. In the bible belt I would guess that nude and pornography are the same thing as far as they are concerned.

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The Free the Nipple campaign was popularized by Scout Willis, Bruce Willis’s and Demi Moors’ daughter.  She went walking around Manahatten half naked to bring attention to the campaign.  It is evidently legal there. Her goal was to bring to the forefront this unequal right of a man and a woman to go shirtless.

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As an intellectual exercise let’s think about this.

If I wanted to make this campaign successful; how would I do it?

First I would need to change public opinion.

The LGBT community has taken an in your face approach which just pisses people off.  If you want people to buy in, that is not the way that I would go about it.

There would have to be a strong differentiation between nudity and pornography.

The folks that would be for it:  would be some very liberal women, and I suspect most college kids as most of them are certainly more liberal than those of us with some age on us.

Support for them might also come from men who A: liked to look at breasts and B: men who are evolved enough to recognize that there is indeed a legal disparity.

Against: conservative religious groups comprising of women and men.

Overtly conservative people of no religious conviction but their upbringing may have had religious ties.

The “for” group is easy to figure out, the “against” is a little more complex.

1 Timothy 2:9

9Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, 10but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness. 11A woman must quietly receive instruction with entire submissiveness.…

I think that this is the verse that probably would most likely be used as against it.  However; looking at this in context, Paul is talking here about wives, not women in general, and I think he is really addressing the roles of wives with their husbands.

I also think that “religious folk” would find the “free the nipple campaign” to be incongruent with their teachings and beliefs, and might even equate this with the work of the devil.

I maintain that clothes were born out of necessity to protect one from the elements and not from modesty. Modesty is most likely a byproduct of wearing clothes.

If a poll were taken, I would guess that it would be about 30% give or take, of the country might be for it, so here is my advice.

It is no surprise that there are parts of the country that are more liberal than others and there is also no surprise that there are places where this type of “dress” would be more acceptable than others, downtown Manhattan or, downtown anywhere for that matter; not so much, for either of the sexes.

Some examples of places might be a beach or community that is set aside for public nudity, certainly.  Your own house or fenced back yard, certainly. Communities that are actually set aside for naturist “buy naked” type places.

Pick your battles:

Blue states and blue counties is where I would go first.  By blue I mean democratic leaning states and counties.  Once you get a foothold in some of those places the idea will spread as this is not a really a political football but democrats seem to be more open to things such as this.  Men more than women will most likely be your allies as men are more open to naturism than women. (in my experience)

I would like to see those folks organize their thoughts and efforts on getting states, cities and towns to set aside areas where public nudity is ok.  There are some places in a few states but, not everyone can travel to another state or country just to be free of the encumbrances of clothing.

It is more than just “free the nipple” however; that really needs to be taken into account.  There is a subset of humanity that is in every country, that is not hung up on clothing, and who feel that nudity is nothing more than a lifestyle.  Who are we to impose our beliefs or likes or dislikes unilaterally on everyone?

There are beaches all around this country and others where it is technically illegal; but the law looks the other way where breasts are concerned.  I would imagine if folks complained, something would have to be done.  There need to be beaches where fair warning is given by posting, and this is legal.  Naturist or just those that want to go topless should not have to break the law in order to do it.

Clothing Optional Beach Sign

Truly, there are some who can look at another human being without clothing and not become erotically aroused.   There are some who cannot, referencing those that cannot get past a woman’s breast and look her in the eyes.  It is those that need to stay away from such areas and it is that reason why public nudity cannot just exist everywhere.

Some folks have issues with this and it is for that reason that it would be unfair to just allow public nudity everywhere, at this time.

Much like an alcoholic should not go into places that sell or have booze, one who has issues with sex should stay away from “public boobs!”  They should have a safe haven just as those that want to be shirtless or clothing less should also have a safe haven.

The free the nipple folks need to focus their efforts on goals that are obtainable and not on some goal that will never happen.  By gaining ground with public places for this type of lifestyle, mankind can protect those that do not want to see it, or cannot handle it, while allowing those that want that lifestyle to be free to live as they choose.

Other countries have parks and such were naturism is perfectly ok. We as America need to unshackle our puritan prudishness and not try to impose those ideals on them.  We are a global community in many respects and joining our brethren on simple things like this where no one is injured is…well….past due!

I am actually pleased to see that shows like “naked and afraid” and “buying naked” are gaining popularity.  I actually think this is a good start to get prudish people aware that they are not the center of the universe but; if they want to wear a Burka or some sort of frock that hides their skin from view, they too have that right. Not many years ago there were police that stayed on the beach with their sole purpose to measure the length of the woman’s bathing costume to make certain that it met with puritan ideals.  Folks, women can smoke although they should not, they vote and if they want things to change they need to, and; they don’t have to wear a bra!  Get over it!

I can’t help but think that “body shaming,” in large part plays a roll in folks thinking ill of this type of thing.

As an artist I study the human body from the inside out.  There is beauty in the Skelton, the muscles, and all things that make it what it is. Having spent time in many hospitals and on many beaches, I have seen all types of bodies “from the inside out” as well as the people who are on the beach in bathing costumes who are definitely out of shape. They are still beautiful.   We all have warts or strange shapes and sizes, and lopsided this or that and if you get hung up on that, your prejudices could color your opinion of whether it should be allowed at all.

I was once invited to a nudist colony, years ago.  I remember telling the person that I happen to think that most folks look better with their clothing on.  It was not about looks however; and years later I discovered that.  It is indeed about freedom to literally be as you are.  No judgment.  It is about Feeling the warmth of the sun on your skin and be around others in a like situation without the sexual overtones or the judgment of others as they too are in this same situation.

There was this one man I will never forget; He was way out of shape, wearing a Speedo if I remember right.  He had a scar from his neck, around his belly button down to his waste and down his leg.  This was a large man!

He was walking on the beach, just like I was, and I smiled when I saw him and thought to myself, “good for you!”

If a Speedo makes you feel sexy, than have at it!  Who am I to judge anyone?   Once you don’t have clothes to hide behind ,you kind of show “yourself” and not just your skin but the person who you really are.  Those around you do as well and that makes for an interesting day.

Are there people who would be mean and think or say ugly things, you bet!  Allowing the opinions of others to affect how you feel about yourself is not a good idea.  If people hurt you with their words, you are in fact allowing it by giving them that power.

Once you know yourself, you take away that power from anyone, as you know who you are, and what you are, and no matter what, you are beautiful.

While the “free the nipple campaign” is about women being lawfully permitted to walk around as men do, without shirts, I think both sexes can learn something from this.  I really need some female input here as I think females might also be stimulated sexually by visual stimuli and just maybe, some half naked guy walking around with the “6 pack” might arouse them, and encourage them to be inappropriate.

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Maybe, just maybe… that is why we hear of 24 year old female teachers having sex with 16 year old boys.  Maybe, just maybe…. we should not be talking about freeing the nipple but covering up the nipples of both men and women… Thoughts?

Summarize here: Organize your efforts by state, city etc and push for places where this type of activity can be made lawful.  Start small and in some of the places that are the easiest, like a small snowball going down hill one success will breed others.  If this is really important, don’t bite off too much at one time.  Pick a state, get to know your city counsel folks and garner public support from that community.  While free the nipple is catchy, and that may be all you need, I might consider finding another more politically correct phrase, which would garner support from more than just a few.   I might actually get in touch with a PR firm and pick their brain.

I don’t know how many people out there would support this; so that might be a good first step.  How large is your base?  To get support from the naturist associations would be a good first step if you have not already done so.  Unlike the LGBT community with their in your face approach you do not want to trample on anyone.  A truculent style of persuasion will get you nowhere! If you want to be respected, you must first respect.

So to my friend that asked me about this, here are my thoughts after much consideration and soul searching.  I hope that you find some of them useful!  As always I welcome friendly conversation, debate and forwards…

-Best

Copyright 2014 TimeDok, All rights reserved.